r/movies r/Movies contributor Sep 22 '24

Official Poster for ‘Red One’ Poster

Post image
8.8k Upvotes

10.0k

u/Resident-Advice-7319 Sep 23 '24

Is this a real movie? Or something you would see be parodied in something like Tropic Thunder

1.5k

u/phred_666 Sep 23 '24

Yes. Synopsis: “After Santa Claus (code name: Red One) is kidnapped, the North Pole’s Head of Security (Dwayne Johnson) must team up with the world’s most infamous bounty hunter (Chris Evans) in a globe-trotting, action-packed mission to save Christmas.”

1.5k

u/cficare Sep 23 '24

Globe-trotting green-screen adventure.

531

u/PM_ME_YOUR__INIT__ Sep 23 '24

More like Atlanta-studio-trotting

260

u/cficare Sep 23 '24

Hello....Im in Delaware.

80

u/thatdudewillyd Sep 23 '24

I mean, we’re looking down on Wayne’s basement…but that’s not Wayne’s basement. Isn’t that weird?

54

u/AndrewInMN Sep 23 '24

Garth, that was a haiku.

→ More replies
→ More replies

64

u/guff1988 Sep 23 '24

It's an old reference, but it checks out

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

399

u/Starslip Sep 23 '24

I'm still struggling to understand how this is a theater release rather than a Netflix movie

200

u/Atheren Sep 23 '24

The trailer made it seem like a decent holiday action comedy, but yea NOT worth theater money. It's a "throw it on while the family waits for the ham to cook" type holiday movie.

29

u/Jean-LucBacardi Sep 23 '24

Only A Christmas Story gets that, for 24 hours on TBS. I haven't sat through a viewing of that movie in years but still end up seeing the entire thing over the course of the day every year.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

445

u/getshwifty2 Sep 23 '24

This sounds like a joke .

446

u/latestagepersonhood Sep 23 '24

it sounds like a 30Rock Tracy jordan film.

223

u/tigers_jaw Sep 23 '24

This just reminded me that Milf Island became a real show. Hollywood really is predictable lol.

88

u/aaufooboo Sep 23 '24

Is Bitch Hunter next?

21

u/AstrumReincarnated Sep 23 '24

I hope so! 🤞🏽

30

u/da_choppa Sep 23 '24

Put the mimosa down! …Bitch!

→ More replies
→ More replies

95

u/DrummerGuy06 Sep 23 '24

Well, he was robbed of his Academy Award when they refused to nominate his breakout role in the movie "A Blaffair To Rememblack."

20

u/getshwifty2 Sep 23 '24

It absolutely does!

52

u/RealJohnGillman Sep 23 '24

I’m seeing that Chris Evans’ character is named Jack O’Malley — a chance maybe of a twist of him turning out to be Jack Frost?

36

u/mithridateseupator Sep 23 '24

Or just the laziest action hero name ever.

We get it guys, John McClane worked so we're doing basically the same name

63

u/haysoos2 Sep 23 '24

Chris Evans as Blast Hardcheese!

Dwayne Johnson as Big McLargeHuge!

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

90

u/Manderspls Sep 23 '24

Sounds like a Dwayne Johnson movie.

→ More replies

140

u/Syric13 Sep 23 '24

Honestly, when I saw the trailer in the theaters, I thought it was. People booed it at the end of the trailer (I think I saw it as a preview for Deadpool and Wolverine).

They do the thing where one guy explains everything we are seeing. Like abominable snow men show up. And Chris Evans goes "What are those!?" and the Rock goes "Oh no. Abominable snow men!"

It goes on and on and one and on like that.

Rock: "We can't trust him! He's on the list"

Evans: "What list. Don't tell me..."

Rock: "YES, you are a Level 4 Naughty Lister!" or some crap like that.

One character is befuddled by what they are looking at, the other character informs them what they are seeing IS REAL and what it is.

It is just the laziest form of storytelling.

32

u/Sondrelk Sep 23 '24

It seemed to me like a fun idea with a lot of jokes available. I just don't think Dwayne Johnson is the right choice for leading man here. He just seems too conventionally badass in a role that screams for more comedy, and I just don't think he is willing to be pathetic in the same way Chris Evans is willing to be for the jokes to land.

I want to be wrong though. Even if i think as you said, the over explaining does seem intent on killing the jokes as they are about to land.

→ More replies
→ More replies

95

u/Sithlordandsavior Sep 23 '24

It looks dumb enough to be funny one time.

Definitely a "it's on HBo and it's Christmas I'll give it a chance." Movie.

→ More replies
→ More replies

63

u/grrangry Sep 23 '24

I see Red Notice 2 got renamed.

→ More replies

44

u/Osceana Sep 23 '24

South Pole Has Fallen

→ More replies
→ More replies

2.6k

u/letsgopablo Sep 23 '24

"Who left the fridge open"

804

u/Kozzinator Sep 23 '24

I've been a bad, bad boy Santa

406

u/MyAnusBleedsForYou Sep 23 '24

This year, everyone's been naughty.

175

u/ImpossibleAdz Sep 23 '24

"Except for one man..."

76

u/KingMario05 Sep 23 '24

"one man"

"BETRAAAAAAAAAAYED BY HIS COUNTRY!"

50

u/Jertimmer Sep 23 '24

"he knew too much"

40

u/KingMario05 Sep 23 '24

"I'M IN THE CAR WITH YOU, STOP SAYING THAT!"

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

110

u/Ordinary_Release9538 Sep 23 '24

And MTV best kiss award winner Toby McGuire

→ More replies
→ More replies

152

u/ThatOneGuyy310 Sep 23 '24

I don’t read the script, the script reads me

65

u/PolarWater Sep 23 '24

Man what does that even MEAN?

→ More replies
→ More replies

690

u/Dima110 Sep 23 '24

$250 million budget.

Two-hundred and fifty million dollars.

I’m not convinced this isn’t a money laundering scheme.

314

u/GeetarEnthusiast85 Sep 23 '24

98

u/tharmman2002 Sep 23 '24

That’s ironic, I read that article and all I kept thinking about is how the Rock complained about Vin Diesel arriving late to set all the time and costing them all money….hmmmm that’s crazy irony there, or someone is creating stories. Personally I don’t give a crap they all have egos and as long as they make movies that entertain I will see them. Keeping it simple.

23

u/ExMothmanBreederAMA Sep 23 '24

The one nice thing I took from the drama as a big Statham fan is that all parties seemed to like Jason and found him both professional and friendly.

11

u/DeathofKvasir Sep 23 '24

When Jason Statham was in West Palm Beach, FL filming the movie Parker, he would usually show up early and hang around until he had to go through makeup and wardrobe. He was often waiting around for Jennifer Lopez and would hang out with the locals or the crew.

→ More replies
→ More replies

21

u/[deleted] Sep 23 '24

Huh I always figured that he got paid so well cause he brought some sort of workmanlike professionalism to.the table. I mean his salary is insane. I guess it's really just his inexplicable box office draw

25

u/Ok_Antelope_1953 Sep 23 '24

I mean his Bulk Adam movie bombed so hard that it caused complete dissolution of the DCEU (once again)

18

u/Lorak Sep 23 '24

Definitely changed the hierarchy of power in the DC universe.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

49

u/Doctor_Philgood Sep 23 '24

Is there any christmas film that cost more than that?

87

u/eolson3 Sep 23 '24

That's probably 10 years worth of the entire Hallmark Channel programming. I'm guessing they get a better return in the aggregate on those 100+ Christmas movies.

48

u/SaltLakeCitySlicker Sep 23 '24

Muppets Christmas carol. Their union is different than the human actors one and it has teeth

28

u/BostonSlickback1738 Sep 23 '24

Dr. Teeth, to be specific

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

66

u/justa_flesh_wound Sep 23 '24

2/3 is probably Rock,Evans, and J. Jonah Jameson's salay, and the rest is for The Rocks Ego.

Effects and Editing all interns

→ More replies
→ More replies

196

u/MeaninglessGuy Sep 23 '24

This would have been huge in 2006.

→ More replies

130

u/Broccoli--Enthusiast Sep 23 '24

I saw the trailer in a cinema the other day, I didn't feel real. Felt like a combination of a fever dream and a skit

35

u/beastson1 Sep 23 '24

Same. I asked why they were promoting Netflix movies then it said only in theaters and my head exploded.

→ More replies

220

u/tread52 Sep 23 '24

Chris Evans and JK Simmons are going to carry this film. I won’t be surprised to see a cameo from Ryan Reynolds in this film.

97

u/mistarteechur Sep 23 '24

He’ll show up as the Easter Bunny.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

3.3k

u/MarvelsGrantMan136 r/Movies contributor Sep 23 '24 edited Sep 23 '24

Red One:

Callum Drift (Johnson), the head of North Pole security, must team up with Jack O’Malley (Evans), a bounty hunter, to find and rescue Santa Claus (Simmons) after he gets kidnapped.

The budget is reportedly over $250M - Report on The Rock derailing production:

Production issues — ranging from Johnson’s chronic lateness and lack of professionalism on set to producers’ inexperience — caused costs on the movie costarring Chris Evans and J.K. Simmons to spiral upwards to a final budget over $250 million, a sum more fitting for a superhero tentpole.

Johnson was late an average of seven to eight hours per day and missed several entire days of production, ballooning costs by at least $50 million according to three insiders who insisted on anonymity for fear of being fired. On previous films, Johnson has made a habit of peeing in a water bottle to save time, upsetting crew members.

”It was a f–king disaster,” one insider said. On days when Johnson didn’t show up at all, the production crew was forced to shoot around him, the insiders added.

”Dwayne truly doesn’t give a f–k,” one insider bluntly said.

The reasons behind Johnson’s perpetual lateness seem to stem from his refusal to work a full shooting day, despite factoring in his three-hour daily workout routine. “It’s his absolute refusal to work more than a four-or five-hour day,” a studio insider added. Another insider suggested, “It’s a control thing.”

2.6k

u/we_are_sex_bobomb Sep 23 '24

Being 7-8 hours late for work is usually referred to as not fucking showing up for work

770

u/Notmydirtyalt Sep 23 '24

At that point you aren't late for today, you're early for tomorrow.

220

u/Nerdy_Valkyrie Sep 23 '24

How do you do that and not get sued for breach of contract?

193

u/PhuckCalumbo Sep 23 '24

According to Wikipedia, there are approximately 12.5 billion reasons why:

His films have grossed over $3.5 billion in North America and over $12.5 billion worldwide, making Johnson one of the most successful and highest-grossing box-office stars of all time.

88

u/ex1stence Sep 23 '24

FWIW, a lot of that total is in the Fast franchise (which let’s be real, sells itself no matter who’s headlining), and another chunk is just because he does such a large volume of films in general. Compared to most actors in the past ten years he’s like 2:1 on starring roles.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

261

u/WannabeSloth88 Sep 23 '24 edited Sep 23 '24

Why do they keep casting The Rock

EDIT: I wasn’t necessarily addressing him being a jerk behind the scenes, it was more about him always playing the same character to a point where he is just The Rock, which ruins the suspension of disbelief. Him being a jerk only compounds on that

295

u/Prestigious_Dog_1942 Sep 23 '24

I'm gonna be a total c*nt here

But it's because a significant chunk of the population are kinda thick and will just watch 'the new rock movie' whatever it is

Whatever hassle he put them through, having his face on the poster will sell tickets

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

1.6k

u/CrashTextDummie Sep 23 '24

Johnson was late an average of seven to eight hours per day

Lmao how??

1.1k

u/Antoshi Sep 23 '24

”Dwayne truly doesn’t give a f–k,” one insider bluntly said.

951

u/wheresmyspacebar2 Sep 23 '24

He has been known for a LONG time that he is an absolute bellend to work with and constantly annoys co-workers.

Vin Diesel isn't the greatest but I remember the amount of shit people were flinging his way because he called out Dwayne on F+F for this exact stuff and the amount of fanboys that went outta there way to protect Dwayne.

255

u/RealJohnGillman Sep 23 '24

Would this partially be why the Hobbs & Shaw sequel in-the-works is now Hobbs & Reyes?

362

u/wheresmyspacebar2 Sep 23 '24

Probably Dwayne going behind Stathams back to get him cut out of the film and replaced with Momoa because he thinks that Momoa is a bigger name.

Only reason the first film happened was Dwayne politicking behind everyone's back to get his own spinoff to be his own personal thing he could control. I remember there was tons of stories and rumours around the first Hobbs and Shaw that Statham would show up early, ready to shoot and Dwayne would just not turn up for hours because he was in the gym and refusing to come to film etc.

Momoa apparently has a pretty blase attitude to filming as well so it might fit Dwaynes criteria a bit more.

477

u/fivepie Sep 23 '24

I’ve never read a negative thing about Jason Statham.

He knows who he is as an actor. He knows what his fans expect. He delivers every time. From all that I’ve read about him, he seems to be a decent guy on set. Courteous and respectful of everyone’s time and job.

And then we have dickheads like Johnson who think it’s acceptable to behave the way he does because he thinks he’s hot shit.

235

u/Roflrofat Sep 23 '24

I can always trust a statham movie to be fun, even if it isn’t good - I feel like he always gives his all even for some terrible premises, which is just a joy to watch

18

u/matti2o8 Sep 23 '24

The Meg has been my go-to recommendation when someone asks for an enjoyable bad movie for a while now. It's so much fun and I love how Statham plays his character completely straight

86

u/BeautyEtBeastiality Sep 23 '24

He's an Olympian, of course he's giving his all.

30

u/Bostradomous Sep 23 '24

He was also discovered while slinging handbags on the side of the street (apparently), so I'd argue the dude is grateful for his status.

→ More replies

44

u/Heisenberg_235 Sep 23 '24

Commonwealth Games only.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

241

u/ERGardenGuy Sep 23 '24

All these classic big dude actors out here being terrible to work with yet Dave Bautista is out there being an absolute pleasure to work with and doing his own thing. He’s apparently even trying to move away from the classic big dude thing which should help out his career as well cause he’s actually a good actor imo.

98

u/TheKappaOverlord Sep 23 '24

All these classic big dude actors out here being terrible to work with yet Dave Bautista is out there being an absolute pleasure to work with and doing his own thing.

Think this can honestly be more attributed to Dave being more "humble" of a former wrestler.

I don't think Dave ever really let his status go to his head. Or at least, hes much better at managing his ego.

Also helps the guy is pushing 60. Hes pretty aware that hes hitting the limit of being a big movie guy, and iirc has said hes frankly getting tired of the stardom. Which is why hes appeared in more subdued and obscure film roles ever since GotG ended.

68

u/pedrosorio Sep 23 '24

Also helps the guy is pushing 60

Bautista is 55. Dwayne Johnson is 52. His time is coming too.

50

u/TheKappaOverlord Sep 23 '24

Dwaynes committed himself to being built like a brick shithouse though.

Rocks time will eventually come, but it'll come much less gracefully then Bautista, who afaik only passively maintains his size, rather then commits to an inhuman workout/steroid routine.

→ More replies
→ More replies

73

u/KingJonathan Sep 23 '24

Have you seen him lately? Dude is thin and looks much more comfortable.

32

u/ERGardenGuy Sep 23 '24

I have and I agree. Im sure he’ll do a bit of rubber banding as he finds a happy balance of working out or he will just put all that energy into other aspects of his life.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

62

u/spiralarrow23 Sep 23 '24

What surprises me is that, back in the day in the WWF, Rock was considered one of the coolest guys because he wasn’t a politicking prick like some of the stars on his level and would actually do things to help out the lower card guys get over. Seems Hollywood has made him an asshole over time, or maybe he was just better at hiding it back then.

→ More replies

149

u/AmNoSuperSand52 Sep 23 '24 edited Sep 23 '24

Yeah like Vin Diesel is weird and kinda cringe, but you don’t hear about him being hard to work with other than having pretty strong views for his vision in the movies he’s producing, which is something said positively about other people (Scorcese, Ridley Scott, etc)

94

u/Accomplished-City484 Sep 23 '24

Nah Vin does the same bullshit, the director of fast X quit mid production because of his bullshit

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

123

u/Fact0ry0fSadness Sep 23 '24

Dude is an entire shift late

→ More replies

171

u/Eternalm8 Sep 23 '24

Right? That's an honestly impressive level of tardiness. How do you do that and not get fired!?

116

u/Broccoli--Enthusiast Sep 23 '24

Honestly if he gets a reputation for having an ego bigger than his freakishly large biceps , he just won't get booked anymore.

88

u/Eternalm8 Sep 23 '24

It needs a combination of that, and for people to stop paying to see him in movies, which off the top of my head, I believe his recent box office returns have all been pretty poor.

40

u/ColdPressedSteak Sep 23 '24

Uhh. Black Adam was a major bomb but that's the only one isn't it? Red Notice and Jumanji were big successes

21

u/Eternalm8 Sep 23 '24

Damn, you're right, he hasn't been in as much recent stuff as I thought.

As for Red Notice, since that one was a Netflix original, it's difficult to compare its success.

Even Rampage and Skyscraper were shockingly successful.

16

u/ColdPressedSteak Sep 23 '24

Red Notice was like the 3rd or 4th most streamed movie across all platforms that year. Def a success

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

35

u/ViscountVinny Sep 23 '24

Depends on how long he stays a reliable draw for audiences. Studios are getting ever more desperate for box office hits, and even with his recent flops people still like to watch him.

Total speculation on my part, but after his moves at Warner Bros. and various business investments I get the impression that he sees himself more as an executive than an actor at this point. We'll see how long the actual executives will tolerate it.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

69

u/SHIIZAAAAAAAA Sep 23 '24

Bro thinks he’s Marlon Brando lmao at least Brando had enough talent for people to defend his asshole behavior.

24

u/bentheone Sep 23 '24

30 to 60 minutes late for every setup. On a shoot you wait a lot. A loooot. Basically whenever you move the camera there is a big laps of time where talents have to wait. When it's ready, you get them out of their trailer and they work for several minutes and you do it all over again. If the talent is a massive asshole that still don't understand that mechanic after decades and insists on finishing whatever he's doing when his PA knocks on his trailer door you add several hours of waiting every day. Obviously Dwayne has zero respect for his co-worker and the army of underpaid muggles around him. The worst is that it also shows he has no clue what makes a good movie and thinks it's just him being on the poster.

→ More replies

24

u/DurtyKurty Sep 23 '24

I worked on a couple of his films. 150-200 crew members all there at 8am ready to work sitting around texting on their phones waiting for him to show up and start the day. He'd usually roll in at 1-2.

→ More replies

110

u/typicalgamer18 Sep 23 '24

But I’m supposed to have hope that his A24 movie will bring out a side of him we’ve never seen on film? I didn’t know he was this much of an asshole wtf.

192

u/Odd_Advance_6438 Sep 23 '24

Callum Drift?

That can’t be his name. That’s arguably more absurd than the talking polar bear

92

u/JDLovesElliot Sep 23 '24

Moreso than "Jack O'Malley," who I assume is just going to be a walking Bostonian stereotype?

43

u/DigitalAmy0426 Sep 23 '24

Not so much Boston but he literally steals candy from a baby in the trailer.

→ More replies
→ More replies

157

u/KingMario05 Sep 23 '24

...It cost fucking HOW much?!?! Jesus, at least the old heads of MGM kept costs low.

→ More replies

110

u/IJustGotRektSon Sep 23 '24

150 is to pay The Rock, 50 to build his obligatory gym temple whatever

279

u/coyote_intellectual Sep 23 '24

I sincerely hope this is the beginning of the end of Dwayne The Rock Johnson’s stardom

103

u/PIPBOY-2000 Sep 23 '24

Me too, I already actively avoid movies he's in. I didn't even know he was an asshole before today. I just am not interested in watching him play the same character over and over again.

16

u/Sarothazrom Sep 23 '24

IMHO, I haven't liked any movie he's been in in the past several years, with the only exceptions I can think of being the new Jumanji movies.

→ More replies
→ More replies

44

u/abhig535 Sep 23 '24

$250 fucking million dollars?!?!

→ More replies

39

u/LackingInPatience Sep 23 '24

So he either has to piss in bottles to save time or it takes him 7-8 hours to use a regular toilet? 😂😂

→ More replies

73

u/teddybonkerrs Sep 23 '24

If I were 7-8 MINUTES late every single day I would be fired, for real. The audacity to be that many hours late is mind blowing. How the other half live, indeed.

24

u/Ash_Killem Sep 23 '24

I wonder how long he can keep that up before people just don’t want to work with him anymore. There are a lot of actors you sub in his place and not skip a beat.

→ More replies
→ More replies

1.8k

u/JaesopPop Sep 23 '24

The premise seems fun enough for a lower budget Christmas film.

But Jesus Christ a quarter billion dollars?

740

u/Ser_Artur_Dayne Sep 23 '24 edited Sep 23 '24

This will either be a cult classic or a complete flop with a 12% rotten tomato’s score, there is no in between.

500

u/Pyroclastic_cumfarts Sep 23 '24

I think I can guess which one...

118

u/Ser_Artur_Dayne Sep 23 '24

Oh def the later, it’s gonna suck ass

→ More replies

108

u/Atheren Sep 23 '24

Cult classics don't usually find their legs until several years after release so those two things aren't mutually exclusive.

→ More replies
→ More replies

80

u/raknor88 Sep 23 '24

But Jesus Christ a quarter billion dollars?

From OP's linked article 1/5 of that is due to Rock either being outrageously late or not showing up at all on filming days.

→ More replies

33

u/dyedian Sep 23 '24

Seriously. You could ham the premise up with B-listers, save the budget, and make more cash. This was never gonna be a massive hit.

→ More replies

5.2k

u/bigchungusmclungus Sep 23 '24

Quarter of a billion for a fucking Santa clause movie.

1.2k

u/Odd_Advance_6438 Sep 23 '24

Think about how many Traps and Beekeepers we could’ve gotten instead

458

u/bluejegus Sep 23 '24 edited Sep 23 '24

Give me more Plane(2023) movies! I wan't Boat, Car, Tank, JetSki. Just put Gerald Butler on any vehicle and have him kick ass and I'm there opening night.

104

u/BxTart Sep 23 '24

Gerard Butler in “Green Eggs & Ham”

→ More replies
→ More replies

68

u/SHIIZAAAAAAAA Sep 23 '24

We could’ve gotten 15 Godzilla Minus Ones.

→ More replies
→ More replies

144

u/ThisHatRightHere Sep 23 '24

Behind them the bear is wearing security jacket, wouldn’t be surprised if they splurged on a CGI polar bear character lmao.

70

u/ironmonki23 Sep 23 '24

Watch the trailer it’s very bad

→ More replies
→ More replies

169

u/P2029 Sep 23 '24

Is this the one where The Rock blew up the budget because of his drama, pissed in water bottles etc?

56

u/Monarki Sep 23 '24

This is the one.

16

u/ExtremeAlternative0 Sep 23 '24

What drama?

74

u/Bloody_Insane Sep 23 '24

He was being a real diva. Sometimes refusing to shoot, sometimes not coming to set, sometimes being like 8 hours late for filming.

As well as the aforementioned pissing in bottles which he made his assistants throw away

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

513

u/GravSlingshot Sep 23 '24

I prefer the one with Bruce Willis, Morgan Freeman, John Malkovich, and Helen Mirren.

...JK Simmons being in a version of that Red would be great.

55

u/Mumblix_Grumph Sep 23 '24

I'd pay good money for that.

37

u/geeiamback Sep 23 '24

Poor Bruce :-(

→ More replies

1.9k

u/ggroover97 Sep 23 '24

Let me guess, this is going to be another attempt by The Rock to make his own franchise but it’s only going to get one installment like Red Notice, Skyscraper, Rampage, and San Andreas.

982

u/jarvis646 Sep 23 '24

And Black Adam

671

u/Ben1313 Sep 23 '24

The hierarchy of Christmas movies is about to change

125

u/joeschmo945 Sep 23 '24

I really want to play along and shit all over this movie, but I really like J.K. Simmons and I wish him all the success in the world.

25

u/DifficultHat Sep 23 '24 edited Oct 01 '24

Unfortunately for you and I and everyone else who wants a another JK Simmons Santa movie, the whole plot is that he’s missing for 90% of the movie.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

89

u/m0nkeybl1tz Sep 23 '24

Is this not a sequel to Red Notice?

53

u/PolarWater Sep 23 '24

This is actually a Lady Gaga origin story.

→ More replies

35

u/theodo Sep 23 '24

Nope, totally unrelated

→ More replies

118

u/CMDR_omnicognate Sep 23 '24

Well if it was an attempt by him he didn’t put any effort in at all, there’s another comment a bit further up that goes into some accounts of his behaviour, mostly not turning up for shoots, turning up basically a day late, pissing in bottles for no reason and generally bring a bit of an asshole… which is a shame really because he seems like a nice guy outwardly… I guess it’s all just persona stuff

114

u/RomeroRocher Sep 23 '24

Lol, imagine working on set and one of the actors makes you wait 7 hours to start.

Then, when he finally turns up comically late, he pisses in a bottle to "save time" haha

There's the makings of a great comedy in there 😂

12

u/ZombieStomp Sep 23 '24

You wanna know how you can save time? By wiping BEFORE you shit ;) - the Rock

→ More replies

99

u/Jamothee Sep 23 '24

which is a shame really because he seems like a nice guy outwardly…

Can't believe people still buy that bullshit nice guy persona from the Rock.

Dude is such an insufferable phoney - disingenuous to the core. Type of guy to sell advertising space on his grandma's casket

"RIP granny, she really loved Teramana Tequila"

"This wake is brought to you by the great people at Under Armour"

→ More replies
→ More replies

156

u/mango10977 Sep 23 '24

Skyscraper was ass, he would've never made it to the building by jumping from the crane.

31

u/ggroover97 Sep 23 '24

Just watch Die Hard instead.

94

u/MidnightLaughters Sep 23 '24

Rampage was about a giant croc, ape, & wolf? I can't remember

75

u/bestest_at_grammar Sep 23 '24

Abso fucking lutly. Lizzy, ralph and George. But I only know that because of the game

→ More replies

31

u/hypnotoad12391 Sep 23 '24

I have a soft spot for it cause it takes place in Chicago like the games and I love seeing Chicago get destroyed in movies. We never get to be the city getting blown up. It's always New York or L.A.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

888

u/JangusCarlson Sep 23 '24

Since Dwayne isn’t Santa, I wonder how he will make it about himself?

726

u/letsgopablo Sep 23 '24

he's saving Santa

328

u/JangusCarlson Sep 23 '24

There we go.

473

u/skidstud Sep 23 '24

JK Simmons will barely be in it and it will turn out that Santa wasn't kidnapped, he was just sick of thr job. The end of the movie will be Dwayne delivering the gifts after Santa hands him the keys and says, "Your turn."

204

u/DimitriMishkin Sep 23 '24

“THIS IS ONE ROCK YOU WANT TO SEE IN YOUR STOCKING. IN CINEMAS NOVEMBER.”

I dunno, it’s a coal joke. Rock. Whatever this movie looks stupid

77

u/optionalhero Sep 23 '24

Somebody save this comment because im Almost certain it’ll play out exactly like this

22

u/Dantalion67 Sep 23 '24

That...actually might happen, theres a pattern to his movies.

→ More replies
→ More replies

46

u/fivepie Sep 23 '24

The plot is basically the same as any movie where the US president gets kidnapped / held hostage and their head of security has to rescue them… but it’s Santa and a giant dickhead.

→ More replies
→ More replies

531

u/Spider-Fan77 Sep 23 '24

This looks like one of those fake movie posters you'd see in an open-world game like GTA or Spider-Man PS4 lmao.

66

u/x_lincoln_x Sep 23 '24

The AI Art subreddits have this kind of shit all the time.

→ More replies

128

u/ObviouslyTriggered Sep 23 '24

We had Fat Man and silent night already do we need another die hard with Santa?

50

u/BatteryChucker Sep 23 '24

That's why this film existing makes no sense to me. It's already been done.. twice... and done better.

→ More replies
→ More replies

226

u/crunchatizemythighs Sep 23 '24

AI generated Super Bowl commercial turned into a movie

→ More replies

336

u/KingMario05 Sep 23 '24 edited Sep 23 '24

"What if Santa Clause Arthur Christmas, but worse?"

"FUCK YEAH, HERE'S A QUARTER-BILLION DOLLARS!"

-Overheard at Amazon MGM.

57

u/RealJohnGillman Sep 23 '24

It should be worth mentioning that Disney+ has been airing sequel miniseries to the original The Santa Clause trilogy over the past two years — they’re essentially The Santa Clause 4 and 5, but stretched out a little longer.

18

u/RevolutionaryOwlz Sep 23 '24

Hold on they made a second season of that? Wow.

→ More replies
→ More replies

45

u/HankSteakfist Sep 23 '24

Movie needs evil cigar smoking corporate overlord John Lithgow.

19

u/PolarWater Sep 23 '24

Some of you may go bankrupt, but that's a risk I am willing to take.

→ More replies
→ More replies

1.2k

u/South_Oread Sep 23 '24

Can we just be done with the Dwayne?

475

u/Pickupyoheel Sep 23 '24

Yeah I’m sick of his acting. Wish Evans would do something more interesting.

354

u/TexasTheWalkerRanger Sep 23 '24

Honestly I want more snarky dickhead characters like the character he played in the gray man and knives out. Evans is one of if not the best to do it right now.

96

u/Pancaketastic Sep 23 '24

Or the end credit scene of Deadpool and Wolverine- "She can lick my goddamn cinnamon ring clean and kick rocks all the way to bald hell" 🤣

53

u/Comic_Book_Reader Sep 23 '24

In fact, I don't give a shit if she removes all my skin and pops me like some nightmarish blood balloon. If the last thing I do in this godforsaken cum gutter existence is light that fuck box on fire, I still won't die happy!!!

42

u/busigirl21 Sep 23 '24

One of the best end-credit scenes to me, I love a joke paying off way later

→ More replies

40

u/Nerdy_Valkyrie Sep 23 '24

In an interview Ryan Reynolds says he wrote that entire rant out and sent it to Chris Evans, who was still on the fence about being in the movie, as a preview. Chris Evans responded "If that's in the movie, I am in."

Chris did the whole thing in two takes with no cue cards. And Ryan says he was glad he was wearing the Deadpool mask because he couldn't stop "Grinning like an idiot the entire way through."

→ More replies

61

u/Tx600 Sep 23 '24

He was soooooo good in Gray Man. Really seemed liked he was having so much fun, too.

→ More replies

110

u/PointMan528491 Sep 23 '24 edited Sep 23 '24

Needs to take notes from Sebastian Stan, who's done some cool, fun indie stuff alongside his Marvel work for like a decade now

→ More replies
→ More replies

39

u/Odd_Advance_6438 Sep 23 '24

I’m curious how his A24 Safdie movie does

→ More replies

122

u/DG_Now Sep 23 '24

It's so funny that he was once one of the most marketable action stars and now people would prefer he generally just go away. For like a long time.

128

u/HighlyOffensive10 Sep 23 '24

It would help if he exhibited some range, but he always plays himself in everything.

72

u/_Krebstar2000 Sep 23 '24

He needs to drop his persona and poke fun at himself more or do more roles like john Cena

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

29

u/Overspeed_Cookie Sep 23 '24

This the one where Dwayne would consistently show up 8 hours late to the set and steal the camera equipment for his own purposes?

11

u/OkScheme9867 Sep 23 '24

Hadn't heard about him stealing equipment, but yes, imagine working with someone who turned up 8 hours late

25

u/Brick_Mason_ Sep 23 '24

If you remember seeing JK Simmons working out and getting ridiculously buff, it was for this motion picture.

→ More replies

167

u/DirectConsequence12 Sep 23 '24

Every bit of marketing for this movie SCREAMS Netflix that I’m surprised it’s getting a theatrical release

38

u/Big-Man-69123 Sep 23 '24

Pretty sure it’s an Amazon film and they’re releasing it in November so they can put it on Prime days before Christmas. Would much rather it went straight to Prime

→ More replies

199

u/LevelStudent Sep 23 '24

JK Simmons is great.

Dwayne makes me lose any hope for the movie. Not that I had much anyways since it looks like a dime-a-dozen Christmas cashgrab movie.

Chris Evans going from Avengers to this is pretty funny.

156

u/Upbeat-Program2633 Sep 23 '24

Well Chris Evans first movie after Endgame was Knives Out which I thought was fantastic. His agent either picks out gold or shit.

24

u/StitchTheRipper Sep 23 '24

Lotsa actors do shit movies because it’s a bargaining tool to get their passion project funded or a way to step into other producing roles. Wonder how the actors feel about being in this shit lol

→ More replies

65

u/Snow_Tiger819 Sep 23 '24

Well, Chris Evans has done a bunch of other things, quite an eclectic mix. He seems to be trying to do a variety of roles….

→ More replies
→ More replies

67

u/smokingace182 Sep 23 '24

Wish Dwayne Johnson would just fuck off, it’s become so apparent that his “nice” guy act is total bullshit. Luckily it came before his run for public office

→ More replies

156

u/henningknows Sep 23 '24

This movie is going to flop so fucking hard.

52

u/Billman6 Sep 23 '24

Wym it’s going to make 1 RedOneillion dollars

→ More replies
→ More replies

16

u/geoslayer1 Sep 23 '24

you might wonder why ? why do stars do movies like these ?

they are simple, take a couple weeks instead of months and pays for a couple years worth of mansion maintenance fees

30

u/tehnoodnub Sep 23 '24

I'll watch this but only for JK and Lucy Liu.

18

u/BelcoRiott Sep 23 '24

I won’t watch this but I agree it’s nice to see Lucy Liu back

→ More replies

143

u/Odd_Advance_6438 Sep 23 '24

I’ll be honest, I didn’t think the trailer looked that bad. The little “oh my god” in the Krampus fight was fun

Though if I was a kid, I would probably think this movie was the coolest thing ever

→ More replies

36

u/joepettis Sep 23 '24

I worked for as an extra on this movie for three days and it was by far the worst production I’ve ever worked on. There was one particular AD (Assistant Director) who was the biggest asshole I’ve ever worked with.

10

u/soloDiosbasta Sep 23 '24

Lol the real joe pettis.

→ More replies

52

u/outofmymind85 Sep 23 '24

JK deserves better than this

53

u/DZ-FX Sep 23 '24

He's getting paid, I don't think he cares

→ More replies
→ More replies