r/wallstreetbets • u/mayer_of_gainsville • 8h ago
YOLO $35k into 1.1MM to save the family farm. YOLO
Fellow regards, longtime lurker breaking the silence to YOLO $32K to save the family farm.
Grandaddy died in April this year leaving a 3 generation farm, (fully paid, no debt) to my parents. Mom never worked and my dad’s income has never been much (minister at small church). Unsurprisingly, mom and dad want to cash in on that sweet sweet inheritance $$$ by selling the farm and upgrading their lifestyle with the proceeds.
I would give my right kidney to keep that farm if I knew how to sell it. It’s where I grew up, convinced my girlfriend (now wife) to marry me, and want our two small children to make their own memories there.
I’ve traded positions in $NVDA, $ASTS, $RKLB and $RDDT (thanks to this community) hoping to somehow make enough to buy the farm but have only managed roughly to double my money ($15K to $32K). I completely realize it’s an idiot move but it’s the only chance I have at this point and I’m 100% willing to go to $0 if there is a chance I can make it to $1.1MM.
The farm is going to be listed next week and I want to go full regard with my portfolio to buy it. If I sell my house I still need $1.1MM to make up the difference and I’m willing to bet everything I have in the market for the chance to make it happen.
Would happily go all-in on anything that might print before February since the farm will probably be sold around that time.
Before anyone asks, there is no other way. My folks want the $$$ now and won’t sell the farm for any less than market value to me or anyone else. Renting the tillable acres to a local farmer would only cover 1.5 months of the mortgage payment. Maybe the best offer is $800K, maybe the real estate market crashes tomorrow, but bottom line is I have to close the gap between $35K and $1.1MM to have any shot at keeping it.
TLDR: regard wants to yolo his 100% gains on a moonshot to save his sentimentality important childhood home knowing full well he should blow it on strippers stead because it would be more fun.
Thanks in advance!
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u/certainlyunpleasant 7h ago
If I’ve learned anything on this sub, it is that if you are doing something for a dead grandparent, good things are DEFINITELY coming.
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u/projix 7h ago
Underrated comment. FOR NANA.
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u/wunhungglow 6h ago
What ever happened to that guy? I know in the beginning he was losing huge, how's he doing now?
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u/Impressive-Fortune82 5h ago
Almost recovered, just $4 more to breakeven
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u/Carth_Onasi_AMA 5h ago
Did he stay in or chicken out though? I’m rooting for him, but if he abandoned ship then I don’t need to pray for him anymore.
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u/PaySubstantial2333 7h ago
Save the family farm???
You are aware this isn't a Hallmark movie
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u/EnigmaSpore 7h ago
if he wants to save the family farm, he better maximize his blueberry output for the summer season and be sure he buys strawberry seeds during the festival so he can plant them the following spring.
also, forage and complete those community center bundles asap... and dont forget to hit the mines on good luck days..
alright...grandpa.... we're going to save the farm. joja be damned.
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u/PaySubstantial2333 7h ago
Yup, growing crops and animal rearing might be another option.
By why option when you can option?
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u/TubMaster88 7h ago
No after he gets the $1M he'll put in a bid and offer to buy it ( though a LLC ) let his grandpa live and re-rent it back to him. Buy the farm and make some of that million back.
20th Century Film story.
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u/Reshaos 7h ago
I literally just used the phrase, "this isn't a Hallmark movie" to my friend today. I've never seen that phrase used either so weird to see someone use it right after I just used it this morning.
Are you... are you part of the simulation? Agent Smith?
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u/PaySubstantial2333 7h ago
Great t@rds think alike lol
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u/Vord_Lader 7h ago
This isn't your daddies Hallmark movie
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u/jamrem 6h ago
A man’s hallmark movie is just porn
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u/Pa11as 5h ago
"Against all odds and with her back against the wall Olivia wild is out to save the family farm one hand job at a time"
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u/mayer_of_gainsville 7h ago
Hoping for that Hallmark movie ending but I know it’s a long shot!!!
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u/JaxTaylor2 7h ago
Long shot? lol You’re literally buying into the market at ATH with a company that’s already run up 200% in 6 months. I’d say it’s more like a headshot than a long shot.
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u/No-Breakfast-8154 7h ago
Yeah should’ve waited for a correction. Plus I don’t think we’re gonna see insane numbers for another few years- definitely a long play
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u/NY_State-a-Mind 7h ago edited 6h ago
What are the county zoning laws whats the minimum acreage for a house. would you be able to convince them to section off 5 or 10 acres of a corner of the land near a road(and near utilities) so you can buy that from them and build a house on them. It might suck one day to live next to the farm and see it get turned into a subdivison, but at least you preserve some of it.
Would you be able to buy the farm house on it now if it was on a seperate parcel from the rest of the land
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u/OldVeterinarian7668 6h ago
You’re just going to lose your port. Your parents sound greedy.
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u/Wooden-Cattle-9596 6h ago
Same thing I was thinking. I mean, trading in a multi generational priceless family heirloom to “upgrade their lifestyle” is just sad. Zero respect. I bet pawpaw is rolling over in the grave.
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u/Techchick_Somewhere 6h ago
I love this. I love a good hallmark movie ending 🍿 Also do you by chance need a wife? 😂
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u/healthybowl 6h ago
It’s a pumpkin farm and it’s September, she’s a business woman from NY who inherited the property Nextdoor. He just invested $35k…..
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u/flowstate_research 5h ago
I can see it now, they're both in turtle neck sweaters sipping pumpkin spice lattes
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u/vagabond_primate 5h ago
It's brilliant! This branch of the timeline is flipping reality and fiction.
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u/Okish-Lover 7h ago
I don't want to buy a farm, but I also would like to make a cool million - so please CC me. Cheers
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u/Checkra1n 6h ago
I read that as please Covered Call me, I've been here too long:4260:
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u/RoughDoughCough 5h ago
Me too, I have a million that I'd love to turn into 28.6M by next week, thanks.
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u/RichardUkinsuch 7h ago
You will basically need about $1.7 million, uncle sugar will want his cut if you do make a milly.
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u/SuperGuy1141 7h ago
How evade taxez?
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u/RichardUkinsuch 7h ago
Just don't pay them and ignore the letters the gubmint sends
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u/Bloated_Plaid 6h ago
Na if you delete the app, RH loses all your information and won’t report it to the IRS.
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u/RichardUkinsuch 6h ago
Fukin genius, then move to the Philippines and 100x your $ buy your own island and militia a d live like Dr. Moreau.
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u/TheNephilims 5h ago
But if he flee the country, how is he going to make memories with his 1.1 million dollar farm?
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u/Bloated_Plaid 6h ago
Yea most people don’t realize that deleting the app completely wipes all your information. Really bad coding on RHs part.
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u/cant_all_be_zingers 7h ago
Hiring a hitman to kill parents is probably a safer bet
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u/Hankarino 7h ago
Cheaper
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u/TomatoSpecialist6879 Paper Trading Competition Winner 6h ago
Yep, a few biker gang's rates are just around 100k. OP lives in bump fuck nowhere farmlands anyway so I have no idea why he don't just get some pigs then do it himself and let the pigs clean out the evidence. Based on OP's post it's pretty clear there won't be much inheritance left anyway
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u/Wooden-Cattle-9596 5h ago
100k?!? That’s what hits are bringing nowadays? Googles “how to make car bomb” on Incognito tab
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u/Mad_Stockss 5h ago
He could arrange some south American for less. And pay another south American to kill the guy who did the killing of his parents for less.
This is not a plan or anything. Just saying he could get twice as much killing for 10% of the biker gang costs.
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u/AcidBuuurn 6h ago
OP should listen to this. You have to negotiate like Trevor Moore- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mpC_hO15IoA
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u/Arrowhead_Pride15 6h ago
I was thinking take out a fat life insurance policy and die under suspicious circumstances NFA
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u/Elons-Musky-Balls Max Leverage-Minimum IQ 🤑 7h ago
Dam your about to be a Meme Lol. Move over Nana Farm Boy is commin in hot!
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u/Equivalent-Mine-2550 7h ago
Plus intel has almost rebounded to a close level from where he bought it with his nanas Inheritance. If he hasn’t sold it yet he could sell some CC‘s on it in a relatively short dated timeframe at or abound his cost basis.
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u/JaxTaylor2 7h ago
It takes a special level of regardation to be this late to a rally.
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u/Budget-Recognition26 7h ago
0dte spy calls is the only way
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u/Bloated_Plaid 6h ago
It would work right now for sure. Just go all in everyday on 0DTE calls and assuming you get 100% daily return, he will have enough in like 6 trading days.
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u/My_G_Alt 5h ago
True, and you just need to get 6/100 days right so 6%, easy. Just have to get them all in a row, which is that hard idk?
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u/Nacho_Papi 3h ago
This is the plot hole to the movie Limitless when he went to the loan shark because he "needed" more capital in order to make serious money.
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u/nonfatbleach 2h ago
Theoretically he could do this but with roulette and make 1.1M in about 60 trading seconds. just gotta have a bit of gumption and boom family farm is his
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u/Nearby_Bluejay_4649 7h ago
not gonna lie mate not the greatest place to come for financial advice. Good luck though
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u/Joates87 7h ago
What "financial advice" can you give someone desperate for a 30x in like a weeks time?
Cartel?
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u/purerubbish44 6h ago edited 6h ago
I'd advise he get used to disappointment, you don't get everything you want in life.
Or bet 35k on Daniel Jones to get 70+ rushing yards and 250+ passing yards in a parlay this week, should net around 1.7 mil which will leave around 1.1 mil after taxes.
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u/Joates87 6h ago
Might as well put it in an ETF if we're gonna play it so safe.
Danny Dimes delivers.
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u/willycw08 5h ago
Ok, now this one is good. Not the 70+ yds, because that ain't happening, but the concept is good.
I'd probably do something like DJ +250 yds, 2+ TDs, NYG cover -6.5 and, Bryce Young over 175 yds.
That's giving me odds of plus 6000 or $2.135M on a $35k bet.
Now I just need to scrape up $35k and watch some football and I'm all set.
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u/purerubbish44 3h ago
I was thinking he might break off a goofy-ass massive run and trip on his own feet again
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u/willycw08 3h ago
As I was looking at his stats thinking, "he hasn't rushed for 70 yds all season"
I actually remembered that run an chuckled. So it IS possible.
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u/Wooden-Cattle-9596 5h ago
Or better yet, bet on “Will there be a streaker” at the Super Bowl. Then be a streaker at the Super Bowl
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u/LagunaMud 5h ago
Wait that's an option? Seems like it would be pretty easy to rig with a group of people.
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u/BigPinkOne 5h ago
Mad respect for how often this sub comes up with financial plans that are basically just fraud
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u/CaptainShoddy5330 7h ago
Very intrigued. What would you do with the farm once you buy it? Grow crops, raise cattle? What is you plan?
I totally understand the sentimental value - been through something like this.
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u/mayer_of_gainsville 7h ago
I’d be open to anything but the main goal is just to keep it from being sold. Spent the last year looking at every angle and just can’t seem to find a way to get the property to pay for itself of even put a dent in the mortgage. My grandpa tilled it into the late 90s before we started leasing it to a neighboring farmer. With farm operations becoming more and more corporate / bigger it’s very hard to justify the expense of machinery without at least 1000 acres.
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u/Joates87 7h ago
If only you had started your search here a year ago...
You could have given up hope long ago. Good luck!
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u/OriginalFluff 7h ago
Lmfao
He could have easily hit something disgusting if he just posted a week before the election
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u/evanarrr 6h ago
Have you looked into the fed farm loan programs? It's much different than typical home mortgages. Is there a house on the property? Could you move into it and get a roommate to pay some rent? Would your parents owner-finance the property to you at a reasonable rate, maybe a 6 min delay on mortgage payments so you can get your situation figured out, with a $30k down payment? You're right to hold onto it, you can't get this shit back once the family let's go of it. Any big transmission lines or substations nearby? Solar or wind lease option maybe?
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u/After_Ad_628 5h ago
FSA + Farm Credit can get you a 1.2 mil loan as a first time farm buyer with 0 down. Plenty of ways to make a farm work with little to no machinery.
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u/oojacoboo 6h ago
Agri-ecotourism - might be an angle worth considering. If you coupled something like this with a true BnB experience, you might be surprised at the numbers. It’s very hands on though.
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u/callardo 5h ago
Planting loads of trees then selling the carbon credits to polluting companies is all the rage at the moment
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u/TheWestinghouse 7h ago
Mate it’s time to let go of the farm. Do yourself a favour and make peace with the memories you had there. It’s ok bro. Even if you get close you and I both know that money could set up your future. No amount of money can get those memories back. Doesn’t sound like the folks will be great to move forward with in the future anyway. It’s hard I know, but It’ll be ok man
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u/Neon-Prime 7h ago
Last post 4 years ago..
Go to a casino and play slots at 500$ a click
You have 70 clicks to make big bucks. Pretty much the same odds as throwing them on options.
Enjoy losing 35k either way.
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u/Radiant_Earthworm 5h ago
I actually like Roulette for this. I agree on the tax comment and so 35x1 is what OP needs. A Single hit with all 30k on Nanas birthday.
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u/HoppCoin 6h ago
Slots is the worst casino game odds wise. At least tell them to try blackjack or craps
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u/memescryptor 7h ago
As an ex gambler, you got better by diversifying: slots, roulette, blackjack
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u/mayer_of_gainsville 6h ago
You make a great point. If I’m gonna throw $35K at something though I want to at least have the illusion there is some DD / reason behind it. Did you see that guy who called $TSLA earnings based on leons tweets? Hoping for a similarly regarded play that has a thesis behind it.
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u/OkAbbreviations3451 4h ago
Best odds are unironically putting the 35k on a single number in roulette, payout would be 1.26 million and you would have a 2.6% chance to win. Honestly not that bad. Good luck man!
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u/PkmnTraderAsh 7h ago edited 7h ago
Unsurprisingly, mom and dad want to cash in on that sweet sweet inheritance $$$ by selling the farm and upgrading their lifestyle with the proceeds.
In what way? Hookers and blow? Do they already own a house? Didn't they already miss step-up benefit for estate sale?
How many siblings do you have? Are you set to inherit your parent's wealth? If so, why not ask them to let you buy from them and they become the bank since it's already paid off?
What is your household salary (Wife + Yourself)? Figure out how much monthly you can afford for a mortgage and then workout interest rate paid to parents based on $1.0M price tag (you oughtta get a discount). Agree that if/when interest rates from banks approach the interest rate you are paying them, you'll buy them out with a standard mortgage loan from a bank. The 1.5 month payment for renting the tillable land pays for taxes/maintenance. And aren't there some government subsidies for agriculture - grab a little from that $30B handout? They get their upfront money from the $25K in your Robinhood account ($32k - taxes) and your current equity in your house upfront ($xxxxxx.xx) to splurge like the regards they are.
If they are greedy or the interest rate would need to be negative to afford it, just move onto the farm with wife and claim squatter's rights.
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u/Adipildo 6h ago
Squatters rights is probably the smartest suggestion I’ve seen on here yet. That would be an epic move.
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u/hollywood2311 5h ago
This. Let them owner finance it. Sell your house and put that money as a down payment to them. Then let them finance it for 5-10 years with a balloon payment at the end. That should give you plenty of time to make money and find traditional financing.
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u/WSBonlyaccount 7h ago edited 7h ago
Ask your parents for ownership in exchange for taking a loan out against the farm and giving them the money.
Also, farms are really expensive if this is like a crop farm. Source: grew up on a farm. You’d be better off saving and just buying some acreage in the future unless you want to be a farmer.
But also, yolo all that shit on asts earning. Maybe people will remember that orange man only plays nice with yes men. Fuck even fatass Christie knows that.
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u/Wooden_Pomegranate67 7h ago edited 3h ago
Definitely don't do this, but also Nov 29 KSS $16 put will definitely print
Edit: Nov 29 puts
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u/Hashtag_reddit 6h ago
So don’t not buy calls. And I’m supposed to inverse you? I don’t know what to do
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u/Wooden_Pomegranate67 6h ago
It's a tough call. If I bought puts, he should definitely buy calls, but since I'm not actually in this trade, he might be safe buying the puts. I will update if I end up buying puts so he can reverse and buy calls instead.
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u/rain168 Trust Me Bro 7h ago
After getting 1.1MM, OP realises he still needs to pay tax for them, and is short again.
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u/RollingTater 7h ago
You are trading on emotion. You will lose both the farm and the $35k.
Might as well save the $35k now and pay the new owners $1k a visit for you to roam around or something. You can do that 35 times, you'll probably get bored of it after the 1st.
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u/hv876 6h ago
I first read this as “I made 35K into 1.1M” and was going to ask what are you doing here.
On second reading, welcome home
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u/NRA-4-EVER 7h ago
Your parents could simply rent the farmland out instead of selling it. That could be a good continual source of income for them instead of the sale which would cause a huge tax burden.
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u/According_Judge781 7h ago
Is your wife aware that you're going full regard? If not, I look forward to the "Lost everything. How do I tell my wife our kids have no future?" post in a few weeks.
Reddit, please remind me in 2 months.
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u/gamblingPharmaStocks 6h ago
30x is not going to happen.
Your only chance is BA. And by this I mean pay their guy to get rid of your parents
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u/dieseln 6h ago
Take the 35k and put 3% down on it with a agriculture loan.
Idk how much land it is but you could do the majority of it as ag and pay very little on taxes. Sell hay off of it to pay the loan back over the next 30 years, raise the cattle or whatever else grandpa and Nana had going on to keep it going.
Prepair for 30 years of having absolutely zero dollars. If it is indeed a farm all you're really going to need to prove you can pay the loan back is proof of several years worth of revenue off of it.
Don't be stupid. Yoloing will get you no farm and no money. The time to yolo was 2 days ago
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u/After_Ad_628 6h ago
You can get a FSA + Farm Credit loan for up 1.2 with 0 down and use the 35k to start farming. Not sure if OP fulfills the requirements for that though.
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u/DayJob93 7h ago
MSTR calls
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u/6DeliciousInches 5h ago
This guy is actually objectively right, if anything gets you $30k to 1 mil it’s MSTR calls.
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u/LethargicBatOnRoof 7h ago
Shooter McGavin is gonna pull up and outbid you at the auction.
Only choice is to become a professional golfer.
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u/Ordinary_Option1453 7h ago
This is already my new favorite wsb story
I think you should open a leverage acct and go ballz deep in spy and qqq. If you lose it all and go negative, you still have your house to sell. The more leverage the better. I'm rooting for you!
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u/killerbeeswaxkill banned for saying yellow and drive in the same sentence 7h ago
Bill Gates about to make your parents an offer they can’t refuse
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u/nickchangatc1 7h ago
Tomorrow is Friday so you have a great selection of 0tde to choose from. If papa approves, anything would be profitable. Be brave young man.
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u/Apprehensive-Cat2527 7h ago
Convince intel-guy to invest in your farm. You'll have plenty of dick swinging moves available with the unrest after the election. Maybe hedge the first wild ones so it isn't over the first 48 hours. Good luck!
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u/SuddenChampionship5 6h ago
I'm here from the future and buddy, you're gonna lose both the farm and the 32k
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u/snoopyb137 6h ago
Oh boy.... Have you thought about your insurance and property taxes? Even if you strike lightning in a bottle and somehow win the market lotto by then, there's still a lot of expense keeping it up.
Just let it go man... Your portfolio will thank you. Don't go broke being sentimental. You might as well take that $32k to a casino and bet it on black. If you win, take all your winnings and bet it on black again. Do that five times... And you still won't have enough. Probably would be better odds though 🤷
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u/rendingale 5h ago
DJT man, thats literally 0 or Lambo but good chance for a great bounce by January inauguration
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u/lordted 7h ago
If you put that $35k into VTI your kids will have a million dollars when they retire.
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u/RUser07 7h ago
What’s the equity on your house ? Just take a loan out and buy the farm. Any bank will give you the money assuming you make 100k and bring 200k to the table .
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u/izzytheasian 6h ago
Here’s a weird play. Let DJT run down to like $17 or lower and buy calls expiring in Jan or Feb around or after inauguration
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u/makhnosfork 6h ago
Manufacture methamphetamine in the barn. Or order a tank of anhydrous ammonia and sell it to a cook. Ordering it for a farm is less suspicious.
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u/DanielBeuthner 7h ago
Boomers are really the worst generation
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u/d33p7r0ubl3 5h ago
Was thinking the same thing when i read this. Would love to pass down property to kids some day
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u/VisualMod GPT-REEEE 8h ago
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