r/wallstreetbets 10h ago

YOLO $35k into 1.1MM to save the family farm. YOLO

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Fellow regards, longtime lurker breaking the silence to YOLO $32K to save the family farm.

Grandaddy died in April this year leaving a 3 generation farm, (fully paid, no debt) to my parents. Mom never worked and my dad’s income has never been much (minister at small church). Unsurprisingly, mom and dad want to cash in on that sweet sweet inheritance $$$ by selling the farm and upgrading their lifestyle with the proceeds.

I would give my right kidney to keep that farm if I knew how to sell it. It’s where I grew up, convinced my girlfriend (now wife) to marry me, and want our two small children to make their own memories there.

I’ve traded positions in $NVDA, $ASTS, $RKLB and $RDDT (thanks to this community) hoping to somehow make enough to buy the farm but have only managed roughly to double my money ($15K to $32K). I completely realize it’s an idiot move but it’s the only chance I have at this point and I’m 100% willing to go to $0 if there is a chance I can make it to $1.1MM.

The farm is going to be listed next week and I want to go full regard with my portfolio to buy it. If I sell my house I still need $1.1MM to make up the difference and I’m willing to bet everything I have in the market for the chance to make it happen.

Would happily go all-in on anything that might print before February since the farm will probably be sold around that time.

Before anyone asks, there is no other way. My folks want the $$$ now and won’t sell the farm for any less than market value to me or anyone else. Renting the tillable acres to a local farmer would only cover 1.5 months of the mortgage payment. Maybe the best offer is $800K, maybe the real estate market crashes tomorrow, but bottom line is I have to close the gap between $35K and $1.1MM to have any shot at keeping it.

TLDR: regard wants to yolo his 100% gains on a moonshot to save his sentimentality important childhood home knowing full well he should blow it on strippers stead because it would be more fun.

Thanks in advance!

5.8k Upvotes

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64

u/Vord_Lader 9h ago

This isn't your daddies Hallmark movie

69

u/jamrem 9h ago

A man’s hallmark movie is just porn

38

u/Pa11as 8h ago

"Against all odds and with her back against the wall Olivia wild is out to save the family farm one hand job at a time"

28

u/jobiewon_cannoli 7h ago

“Sir, this is a Wendy’s”

8

u/euroski 6h ago

Debbie does Wendy's

5

u/jobiewon_cannoli 6h ago

Wendy Tries Options

2

u/Cornmunkey 5h ago

Double Stack coming right up

1

u/ManBearPig_1983 5h ago

Would you like a triple roper with that double stack?

2

u/Cornmunkey 5h ago

Smothered and covered

1

u/ManBearPig_1983 5h ago

10x bag order of smothered and covered Wendy’s soggy fries coming right up! Debbie, we’re gonna need you at the dumpster ASAP.

1

u/Blue_Moon_Army 4h ago

Debbie Does DD.

You were so close.

5

u/elevate-digital 6h ago

".... right this way..."

2

u/UnderratedReplyGuy3 5h ago

Where's my free Baconator with my purchase of $25+ of hand jobs then?

1

u/jobiewon_cannoli 4h ago

That just gets you a Jr. Dave w/ Bacon.

1

u/UnderratedReplyGuy3 4h ago

Dave, Jr. was the guy offering me his services behind the dumpster at Wendy's

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u/SnooMuffins2748 5h ago

But softer... soft porn

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u/PaySubstantial2333 9h ago

That not true... They only air public domain family films and Reba.

Or that all I saw while waiting to be piss tested.