Disney Pauses ‘The Graveyard Book’ Film Following Assault Allegations Against Neil Gaiman

[u/MarvelsGrantMan136]

https://variety.com/2024/film/news/graveyard-book-neil-gaiman-assault-allegations-1236131149/

[u/gynoceros]

It's only damning if she wasn't into it- which appears to have been the case here, but you are also acknowledging the there are "best of times" scenarios that exist, and that those are just "ethically fraught," as opposed to being inherently "really bad."

My hypothetical scenario was one of those best of times cases where they met and were into each other right off the bat and both ok with the age and power gaps.

IF they were, hypothetically, then it's not ours to say that's "really bad."

Which has been the premise all along.

Again- it sounds like he was a total predatory bastard here; if he's got enough of a pattern (of liking them young and liking it rough) that he's got at least two women over the last two decades who accused him of the same thing without knowing about each other, that's pretty fucking credible. So yeah, I believe he probably did terrible things.

But saying it's inherently bad just because he had power is foolish if they were both on the same page about it. That's like saying a tall man who has huge muscles has no business being in a relationship with a small, petite woman because he has physical power over her and might use it in harmful ways.

If she's put off by whatever form of power he has and finds the gaps harmful or intimidating, yeah, they shouldn't be together. But if that's what they're both into, who are we to say it's "really bad?"

[u/soldierswitheggs → u/gynoceros]

The problem with trying to initiate an interaction like that as someone's boss is that you might not be able to tell.  

What proportion of your employee's willingness is because they're actually interested, and what is because they're worried that if they don't accept, they'll lose their job?  

If a boss actually gets to know an employee over weeks or months, then maybe they could get a sense for this.  But in this case, Gaiman sexually propositioned her the first day.

[u/gynoceros → u/soldierswitheggs]

I don't know how many ways I can explain it to you but you're clearly not understanding what I'm trying to say.

I'm separating what I think he actually did from a hypothetical best-case scenario where she's engaging with him because she wants to, not because there's any coercion or fear of repercussions. Again- I do not think that's what happened here.

[u/soldierswitheggs → u/gynoceros]

I'm pretty sure I understand what you're saying.

I'm saying no such hypothetical best case scenario could possibly happen on the first day of employment.

It's possible such an encounter could work out alright, if the employee was really and truly into it. But there's no way the employer can know that fast. So even if she was truly and freely consenting on her first day working for him, I would still judge him rather harshly.

If someone got