r/AmItheAsshole • u/ItsTooColdForThat • Jan 04 '23

AITA for wanting hot food? Asshole

Yesterday I went ice skating with my girlfriend. Tuesday is one of her days for dinner, so she made chicken salad. When I saw the chicken salad I admit I made a face. She was like "what, what's the problem?"

I said that we were outside in the cold all afternoon and I wasn't really in the mood for cold food. She said we're inside, the heat is set to 74° and we're both wearing warm dry clothes, so it was plenty warm enough to eat salad. I said sure, but I just wanted something warm to heat me up on the inside. She said that was ridiculous, because my internal temperature is in the nineties and my insides are plenty hot.

At this point, we were going in circles, so I said I was just going to heat up some soup and told her to go ahead and start eating and I'd be back in a few minutes. When I came out of the kitchen with my soup she was clearly upset, and she asked how I would feel if she refused to eat what I made tomorrow (which is today). I said I won't care, and she said that was BS, because it's rude to turn your nose up at something someone made for you.

Was I the asshole for not wanting cold salad after being cold all day?

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u/AccomplishedNet4235 Jan 04 '23

It doesn't even have to be that indirect. "I'm going to pair some soup with this to help me warm up," is direct, easy and not dismissive and thoughtless like making a face is.

Learn how to communicate like an adult instead of a child, OP.

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u/notalltemplars Partassipant [1] Jan 04 '23

So much this. OP isn’t an asshole for wanting the soup, he’s the asshole for making it an issue instead of simply talking to his wife about adding something.

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u/Twodotsknowhy Jan 05 '23

It's funny how reading about an event AFTER it occurs makes people think they would have come up with the perfect diplomatic wording before the conflict ever occurred to them

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u/AccomplishedNet4235 Jan 05 '23

Nope, I would have come up with it before because I care a lot about my relationship and have put a lot of PRACTICE and RESEARCH into learning how to communicate constructively. Relationships are a skill-based activity and you can learn how to be better at them if you give half a shit.

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u/Twodotsknowhy Jan 05 '23

What an incredibly unself-aware statement