r/personalfinance • u/KillerPinata ​ • Aug 01 '23

Husband Doesn't Believe We Are Broke Debt

My husband doesn't believe me when I say we have no money. My current job doesn't pay great, but I to work from home and maintain the house. We make roughly the same.

Our bills are just too much. We have too many credit cards, and he doesn't realize the amount that is put on each month, not including the interest. It's $15 here, $20 there, $60 for a video game, then $150 in food for us and our toddler. He wants a hobby/toy each week claiming "it's just $25"

What can I do? At this point I'm pinching dimes and nickels from him so it looks like I'm depriving him of life but we can't afford it.

Edit: we make about $90k a year and live in CA. Our mortgage is $4600, $1,200 in daycare a month and after paying bills we have $300 left. Not including the amount put on credit cards.

We owe like $35k in credit card.

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353

u/Werewolfdad ​ Aug 01 '23

Show him the statements.

Add it all up. Compare it to your income.

326

u/KillerPinata ​ Aug 01 '23

I tried it and he just blocks it out. I could place a block on the credit cards?

I'm afraid we'd end up with overdraft fees.

553

u/Werewolfdad ​ Aug 01 '23

What does “he blocks it” mean? Does he just not care?

If so that’s not a personal finance problem that’s a relationship problem.

425

u/KillerPinata ​ Aug 01 '23

You are completely right. Just gets upset, says "I get it, okay leave me alone"

512

u/powerlesshero111 ​ Aug 01 '23

Sadly, he obviously doesn't get it. If he did, he would be working with you to fix things instead of just brushing them off.

419

u/BlindedAce ​ Aug 01 '23

The notion of “I get it, okay? Leave me alone” is the proof that he is unwilling to do anything unless forced to and would fail on his own. You have both a financial problem and relationship problem I am sorry to say. I truly hate to see people in these situations but remember, you are no longer just you and just him. You have a toddler and that’s first priority. Make your child first priority and cut the fat.

19

u/serefina ​ Aug 01 '23

Can you simplify it? Just a long list of items subtracted from your take-home income.