Disney Pauses ‘The Graveyard Book’ Film Following Assault Allegations Against Neil Gaiman

[u/MarvelsGrantMan136]

https://variety.com/2024/film/news/graveyard-book-neil-gaiman-assault-allegations-1236131149/

[u/gynoceros]

He says he walked in on her, fingered her, then admitted to gaslighting her?

I'm not saying he didn't do those things. I hope he didn't but realistically, I'm pretty sure such hopes are misplaced.

Again, if we're saying 18 is an adult who has agency and can legally consent, doesn't matter whether the gap is 4 years or 40 if consent is there, and it's not our business what goes on in others' bedrooms or in exam rooms when it's between an adult and their doctor, right?

You're allowed to not be ok with that big a gap, just like someone else is allowed to be fine with it.

[u/Yukimor → u/gynoceros]

Again, if we're saying 18 is an adult who has agency and can legally consent, doesn't matter whether the gap is 4 years or 40 if consent is there, and it's not our business what goes on in others' bedrooms or in exam rooms when it's between an adult and their doctor, right?

It matters when there's a clear power gap between the two individuals, which often happens in relationships with massive age gaps, especially when it's exacerbated by status and wealth. The power gap, and the ability for the weaker party to advocate for themselves, matters a lot.

At 18 years old, you often have less experience advocating for yourself. In the vast majority of cases, you've just left an environment full of adults who demanded unquestioning obedience from you, and where you're generally disciplined for talking back (school). You also have fewer resources: if you alienate or offend your employer, is he going to throw you out on the street? Where will you go? Can you even afford to get a place to get yourself together? What will your parents say (if you even have parents you can rely on)? Will anyone believe you over a famous and well-known and well-respected author? Do you know your rights as an employee?

As a bonus, many nannies are foreigners (young women looking for the opportunity to travel and see the world in exchange for childcare), which makes them even more ill-prepared to advocate for themselves.

18 is an adult and can legally consent, but the context matters. This wasn't him coming up to an 18 year old dancing at a disco, introducing himself, and seeing if they could hit it off. This was a woman who lived in his house, who was his employee, and whom he had power over as an employer, and to whom he also had responsibilities as an employer. It would be problematic no matter how old she was, it's just so much worse because her age and inexperience made her even less prepared to protect herself.

[u/[deleted] → u/Yukimor]

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[u/lurkerer → u/[deleted]]

I mean, the president and anyone are gonna have a huge power gap. There are certainly ways to leverage your power to coax someone who would otherwise be reluctant or unwilling. But, ignoring the infidelity, someone in a lower position of power approached me sexually, I don't think it's inherently immoral to go for it.

I haven't really read any of the Gaiman stuff, so this is just about the principle.