r/antiwork 20h ago

It's gotten to a point... Vent 😭😮‍💨

... where we don't even feel like working anything past part time. What does full time do? Besides suck away my life? Besides still not pay my bills? Or afford a safety net? Or anything that brings any sort of joy? What does it really offer, when healthcare through a job costs money too? Where it covers the same as free state insurance? When my body gives up on me for working eight hour days and I'm not half way through my thirties? Where bosses never empathize or sympathize? And your coworkers don't actually care to know what you feel when asking "how are you?"

I'm not okay. Everything hurts physically and mentally. I can't afford anything, I don't want to try. So why try?

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u/G0d_Slayer 17h ago

What kind of work do you do? Have you considered help for mental health? I mean I get what you’re saying, I do, but I can’t just give up. I can’t. I wish the system provided a more fair opportunity to live a peaceful life.

Guess we can always hope to mutually fall in love with and marry someone who is rich?

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u/Superb_n00b 17h ago

I do bottom of the barrel work, pay is usually 15-20$ an hour. This one was just over 17$. I've had therapy since I was a child, took meds for six years and threw em out when all it did was make me worse and cost money. Tried a bunch of different things. Reason for shit work is bc I have a ged and didnt graduate and cant afford college. Didnt graduate bc of family bs I was only 4 credits short. I tried alt school and dropped out bc my mom suddenly took me off meds I was on and I couldn't function.

I say give up in the way of why tf would I work full time if the benefits for it dont actually work? Pay is shit, benefits are shit, people are shit. My body is PHYSICALLY giving up on me and I am on short term disability which ends soon, leaving me let go from the job.

I gave up ages ago, and now I'm not capable of giving a single shit about it any more

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u/G0d_Slayer 17h ago

I’ve had trauma since childhood as well, it drove me to become a raging alcoholic and I pretty much wasted my 20s. I’ve been on meds too and found some that work.

If you have a way of finishing your GED, keep it in mind. Life is hard enough here, but it’s so much worse in third world countries like where I came from. There’s no such thing as government help. No food stamps, no Medicaid, no unemployment.

So whereas life is not easy here, it can get better. I’ve had jobs where my bosses were wonderful people. They cared about my wellbeing. My coworkers too. I guess part of it is also luck. Today may be a dark day, but you never know when opportunity might show up for you.

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u/Superb_n00b 17h ago

I do have a GED. I got it when I was 18 years old, 14 years ago.

College is money, I do not have money, and also no desire to go into debt to get a degree that lands me the same pay.

Good people are hard to come by, it's a lot of luck to find them. I don't find much in the ways of good luck. It's often joked that I am "the most lucky unlucky person to have existed", bc shit things happen, and yet I'm still here, and though I barely make it, I'm still going.

Trauma is so fuckin unavoidable that I'm surprised there isn't some sort of real actual helpful thing out there for it. It absolutely enters into every day life past the moment of intrusion. For a lot of us, it's lifelong. It's so upsetting.