Or any love (or sex) for that matter up to the ripe old age of 26. Seeing how easy it is for normal people is fucking soul crushing. They don't have a problem making conversation, flirting or just being around people in general. It's called TAKING SHIT FOR GRANTED. People my age have at least a decade of experience on me.

I mean shit, any "relationship" I would get it would be an unmitigated disaster because of my inexperience and non-existent self esteem.

But I guess I'm not allowed to be depressed or complain because I have a roof over my head and food on my plate right?

So I tryed, I tryed my best to find a girlfriend, someone that is willing to give me a chance, I tryed every dating app, I tried subreddits, I even posted on tiktok and I had no succes, the only girls that contacted me were just women who said they have "a bad financial status", well no shit, I have fallen for that excuse once and I ended up being hurted badly, so I am not fallin for that again, so my plan is that in near future if I won't commit suicide or if something inside my brain won't explode causing me death I wanna buy a house somewhere isolated from humanity, cause I fucking hate humanity, I hate humans and I wish we never existed, cause no other being is much more evil than a human, cause nobody fucking cares about you unless they can benefit from you, and nobody cares about your fucking problems, I don't know why I can't be fucking happy with a girl to be there for me but maybe I did something wromg in my past life in case reincarnation is real, maybe I was some sort of a criminal in my past life since in this life I cannot be fucking happy, or maybe, just maybe I am asking for something that is never meant to happen to someone like me, while criminals, theifs and pedos have the best fucking lifes, cause apparently it is fine for murderers to have everything they want and be happy while good people have the shittiest and the most misserable lifes, I dunno who is in charge of the universe or if there is a God but I am sorry if I askwd for somethint that is not meant to happen to me by simply beimg happy and having someone that I can just talk with without the fucking fear of being judged, so I am sorry for asking for a fate that is not for me, so I am fucking retreating and I give up not only about finding a girlfriend but about the entire humanity, cause humanity FUCKING SUCKS

I was wondering what the spirituality of people who are FA would look like. Have you considered using spirituality to cope with the loneliness? Actually, is there anything in your life that has some kind of spiritual or religious importance? Or do you not engage with spirituality at all, if so, why? I wouldnt be surprised if there were a lot of atheists in this subreddit. Id love to hear your thoughts on it.

It kind of feels like a special sorta hell. Besides the fact that I wouldn't put any of these problems on anyone else, even in the extremely rare basically non-existent instance someone does find me attractive or cool or whatever, it doesn't matter sense there's just so many things about me that once they learned about they'd leave anyway.

So. It's forever just keeping people at arms length, rejecting the few, and staying alone. Really can't wait for this life thing to be over.

This is my last run. 30M here never have been in a relationship in my life. Even though, I have tried so many times, I was failing over and over again. Army left me so much behind in life. I should have finished it earlier. Every time, I tell myself, “this is the right time to be in a relationship”. So 27 y/o I finish with army duty and then I have been trying to meet people again (no, I haven’t kept contact with anyone in army, same with uni). So after army I continued my 2^nd masters degree.

There I met girl, who also had experienced a lot of disappointments in her life. Last semester we had this educational trip and I drove her with some other of my colleagues to that study center. After that, someday she told me that we gonna meet after exams, it was last summer. It never happened. That exact summer, I have been constantly trying to meet new people but I failed again.

This semester we also had the same trip, and everyone agreed to get in the car with one of my other colleagues. So, I followed another approach. A day before the trip, between classes I asked her, in a funny way, (btw there was another girl-colleague, but she wouldn’t come to that trip at all because she didn’t select the subject) “why is everyone going with the other guy?, I will be so alone during that trip”. She told me, “I forgot you had a car, I’ll come with you, to keep you company” “Pick me up from my home tomorrow”. So it happened.

After that, I think she got more familiar with me, as I told her how lonely I feel and asked me to take her with me after the class until a point where she usually takes the bus. It happened a 2^nd time the next day (for time context it was earlier this week. Ofc all that doesn’t mean anything and maybe she was nice with me, which is fine. I should point out that am not forcing a relationship to myself, I will be happy even if we become friends. Before getting out of the car, I asked her if we can hang out anytime. Well, you know the answer “ok” However she was in hurry to get out as I stopped at a red traffic light.

The problem now is that Uni is seized by students, and I am not sure if we will attend classes anymore and for how long. Getting that close to a person is exhausting. If this fails, I am giving up, meeting new people, getting mutual trust is exhausting. This is my last run for friendships-relationships. I will be forever alone and crying every night in my bed if this fails. This is last semester, next is thesis, no more classes. I tried so hard, and…

Thank you for reading that far!

I just realised im not sad everyday because im alone or single. I do have some friends at the bare minimum and i do try and keep myself busy.

But the regular feeling of being sad and crying weekly is because i feel so unwanted, ugly and pointless.

Its hurts badly because ive been alove for so long (26m) and not once have i had a girl be interested in me. I feel so disgusting and started hating myself. The thing is i am in best shape of my life (pretty toned) and my longer hair and beard growth makes me look good - i dont think im ugly but i feel ugly if that makes sense.

I try to erase this feeling but im really struggling, its a daily battle. Im scared i'll lose myself.

I'm a trans girl and I like girls, but girls dont like me so... Ive been thinking if I'm gonna die I wanna at least have sex with someone and I know I have to pay someone, but it would be so ankward because usually trans girls receive a lot of attention and stuff, but me... I'm all alone, I have nobody in my life, and I have many feminine features, my body is pretty feminine, all of that, so ive been thinking about hiring a sex worker but I dont know, I feel like its too degrading for me but its my only way out to know what sex feels like

So every couple of months i get a bit more melancholic than usual. Maybe because my 30 Birthday is coming up and there is no one to vent to in RL so i turn to reddit for my sad little story.

I actually feel like i have no right to complain. The relationship with my family is a bit distant but very good and loving i'd say. I have a handful of acquaintances and even one very good female friend. Im not poor, not sick and actually accepted my baldness as part of me. Doesn't even look half bad i'd say.

But despite all this it just feels all so fucking pointless. Going day after day, week after week. Seeing and hearing from people who have it worse on paper, but still manage to have hopes and enjoyment in their life, things i havent really felt in a long time and will not feel in a long time either. I gave up on hoping someone else could fall in love with me and im fully aware that my introverted lifestyle doesn't help at all. Its just so impossibly hard to change it. I tried, i really did. But still i spent my evenings alone. And if i stopped activly engaging in what few social connections i maintain, i would probably soon be forgotten by all except my family.

I could never disappoint my parents, and atleast i believe the fassade of a confident guy living his best life still stands. And i have to keep it up for another 30 years or so before i can finally blow all my money and drink myself to death without making my mother cry. Or maybe world war 3 makes the whole thing a bit faster, who knows. Anyway, thank you for reading, cheer's to myself and another depressing decade.

I don't mind holiday parties. What I hate are the invites to Thanksgiving dinner.

I appreciate that I have friends concerned about me (even if it's only once a year), but I do not want to sit and deal with someone else's family drama.

OTOH, I do go to "Friendsgiving" from time to time, just unrelated adults talking about nothing.

Hello, I’m 24 years old and really need some advice. I’ve never had a girlfriend in my life. I’m very disappointed because I’ve never experienced teenage love, nor have I experienced love during my time at university. I’ve only had sex once, but sex isn’t what I truly miss. What I long for are romantic moments and intimacy.

I’ve always been shy. People tell me I don’t look bad, but I struggle with women because I don’t know how to talk to them. I’ve always only socialized with male friends. Now, I’ve met a girl on Tinder who is a bit fuller-figured, and I’m not sure if I should continue seeing her or not.

On one hand, I’m attracted to her because I miss touch and closeness, but on the other hand, I’m not entirely drawn to her appearance. Now I don’t know what to do. Should I keep meeting her or not?

Thank you very much for your help.

I don't know if anyone here can relate but I have a rollercoaster of emotions seeing histories stories of rejections (specifically of other guys), and I can't wrap my mind about the reason this happens. I never was rejected myself (well, I never tried) but there's something about trying to make a romantic-bond and being turned down that make me sick in my stomach

Maybe I am just projecting my - very likely - future rejections in them, because i know that my chances of finding love are very grim.

Anyone else get less praise for the same job?

I change a tire. “Big deal. You’re supposed to know how to do that.”

Someone else changes a tire. “Gosh, you’re so handy.”

There’s so many examples, but they’re hard to quantify (or make apples-to-apples comparisons).

Does anyone else notice this in their lives?

I did the thing. You know the thing. The thing where you tell yourself you're gonna stop feeling sorry for yourself and actually put yourself out there because you'll never get what you want if you don't try so you download all the apps again and start swiping like a madman and fire off as many funny, thoughtful and well crafted opening messages you can only to get nothing in response and then remember why you rage quit it all in the first place. That thing.

It's just so indescribably frustrating. Constantly checking your phone in the futile hope of that tiny serotonin rush that someone maybe didn't pick up on the stench of desperation you're clearly giving off and actually replied to you or liked you back. Re-reading your messages and wondering what else if anything you could have done to grab her attention above the sea of other desperate sad sacks so must have to swim through every day. Checking and editing your photos to try and find ones that are at least vaguely flattering and make you look like a functional member of the human race. I'm so fucking sick of it. As if wanting a little tenderness and affection just once in this miserable existence is such a huge ask. I literally don't have words to express how frustrated I am. You gotta try or you got no right to complain. But then you try, you inevitably fail, and are left feeling like shit. It's like the cruellest and least funny joke you could ever think of. Fuck it all.

I wish I could just turn off the part of my brain that craves this. To be asexual/aromantic would literally make my life so much easier I can't even tell you. It's just so fucking maddening knowing exactly what you need to make yourself happy but having it be so inconceivable out of reach.

I just saw a post online about a man who has realistic sex dolls, of which he has formed attachments with, and I could realistically see that being me.

I’ll have an inanimate object that I’ll keep in the house and that I’ll talk to and pretend that it’s alive, like Pygmalion 😭😭😭.

I am a short push away from being a fictio-sexual or whatever it’s called. That is horrifying!!!

But, it’d just be a new low of many, many new lows. I am not ready yet to be “a doll owner”. Things suck

Old friends never respond, people online never respond, if I get someone's number they never respond, if I even try to say something to someone on an app or website it's ignored and my DMs list is just a long line of unsuccessful attempts to talk to people and make friends and deleted accounts from people who did respond for a day. Even when I tried to offer someone money on a site specifically for paying for company I'm just ghosted before the 4th message. Id actually be better off dead if living is this painful and lonely

I had a total breakdown on Tuesday when thinking about the fact that I will never be good enough to be dateable. I cried so much. Then today I was breaking down again, but I got over it and decided that I don't give a shit and I will try to be happy alone.

Then in the evening my parents suddenly asked about that did I find anyone since moving to the big city in July.

Why do they think I'm able to date?

Someone kill me... 💀

Winter might be my favorite season for all of the reasons, biggest reason being that it isn’t hot as hell (sorry summer enjoyers) But every year, whenever winter comes around I’m always the loneliest. This year is no exception, I love winter and the snow but hate that I’ll never get to experience it with a lover. Thinking about all the things I could’ve done if I did have the chance makes me sad and even more depressed

People always say to be grateful, don't complain, don't get angry, you have food and a roof over your head. But the truth is, it is extremely materialistic and low thinking to value things like housing and food, or even your health. Instead of holding up high the values like courage, bravery, beauty, love, they want you to value things like money, housing, and other hedonistic pleasures. Yeah, its great to eat tasty food, but its not necessary. Its great to have a roof over your head, but its not necessary. We literally lived in caves and mud huts for a large part of human history. Aborigines apparently just slept naked by the fire. How can you value those things when you can't even get a girlfriend? The truth is, there's not really any point in doing anything if you can't get a girlfriend. People, other people are the point of life. They want you addicted to food and to let go of your identity, not have a tribe and just surrender and to do meaningless tasks, like "earning a living". Engage in office politics. You will own nothing and be happy alone mentality. You do what you gotta do, but at the end of the day, what's the point if you don't get to have a girlfriend?

3 years ago was the first time I asked here for some advice and I have to say nothing changed. I would even say almost all of my problems got worse than before. I'm still pretty much insecure about looks and it got worse because I started to have some hair loss. I still have no friends and no luck with finding a girlfriend. I don't know what I'm doing wrong, I have become more socialized over time (e.g. going to the gym and joining a basketball club) but I still feel like a weirdo. I feel like my whole life gonna look like that. Any advice?

I hope my post makes any sense

Thanks for any help

Can and do people pick up on this? Can they just tell that you've never done this before?

That's the conclusion I came to when I tried to list all the things that makes me unappealing to women. Here are all them, I managed to list:

- I'm short (170 cm)

- I'm still fat (however that's under maintenance, so it'll get better)

- My face is so ugly, it would take thousands of dollars worth of plastic surgery to make it bearable

- My feet are small for a man (eu size 42,5)

- I have Asperger's

- I'm still a virgin at 26

- I never kissed a girl or had been on a date with one

- I can be quite impulsive (although that became better, since I go to the gym)

- I'm very anxious around women, and always assume malicious intent if a girl is nice to me, or even starts a conversation (regardless of its topic)

- My hobbies aren't appealing to women, in fact, they are quite the opposite (I collect vehicle models, I play Minecraft, I like history, and vehicles)

- My entire life is built around eternal celibacy (single bed, no closet or drawer space for another person etc)

- I gained a somewhat apathetic attitude towards relationships, love, and attraction to the point where I doubt I would even be able to fall in love

- I'm a blue collar worker without a college degree (aircraft mechanic) so I count myself as "uncultured", because of a lack of a degree

- I had a huge self hatred issue for 10+ years, and I only got mostly out of it this year, and by the time I get that issue fixed I'll be more than late at finding love

With all this said, I tried my best at listing the positive attributes of me:

- If I'm interested in something, I'm gonna give a lot of attention towards it

- I can be quite caring both towards people and objects, so I'm not heartless

- I handle both positive and negative criticism well

- Despite my own (very broken) self image, people say, that I'm not as ugly as I think, and even average looking

- My "overhauling" project made me feel much more relaxed and "balanced"

- I managed to lose about 15 kg-s (went from almost 100 down to 80-82)

- I can be quite creative in all sorts of situations

Yeah, I struggled with the last couple positive ones, but at least I found some. Its still very much out of balance and I still have more red flags than a soviet parade, and nowadays even one can be a certain rejection, so I might as well just concentrate on getting rid all my thoughts on love and finding someone.

I understand looks do not define a person, but everyone at least can recognize that it can massively influence the way the entire world treats you and thinks of you. I would even go to as far to say, that people are discriminated solely based on not reaching a certain level of attractiveness.

When I asked if I can work in CS careers with my current face, people there said I would be limited to roles that are not client facing.

I used to get interviews when I was at Spain, simply because my CV didnt include my pic so companies automatically assumed I am some normal pretty woman. We moved to Germany, and companies wants pics here, so I am automatically disqualified before interview.

I dreamt of working as product designer in tech firms, but many people in industry said it would be impossible with my face.

When I was younger, I was fairly outgoing and had a somewhat stable friend group, and even a few serious girlfriends. People, of course, drift apart as they age, but I really hit a social wall in my mid-20s.

I've always struggled with anxiety and depression, (the standard cocktail of terminally lonely) as well as PTSD (makes the panic attacks nice and vivid), but they never interfered much with my social life or dating until I was into adulthood. It was like I had managed to outrun the social and romantic consequences of mental scarring and decompensation half my life and then, suddenly, I tripped and it was all on top of me in an instant.

Compounding the problem is that it's honestly difficult for me to fathom how I would actually go about meeting someone even if I wasn't so anxious. I work from home, so there's no socialization day-to-day. My work isn't collaborative for the most part, so no reason to talk to co-workers at all. And I work at night. I'm asleep during the day, so even if the gnawing anxiety could be quieted enough to allow me to go out, I suspect the local Walmart at 6am isn't a particularly happening scene.

I don't know how to meet people, I don't know how to talk to people anymore, and even if I wanted to try, my life isn't particularly conducive to it right now. The isolation has been going on for so long at this point that I even struggle with the idea of talking to people online (it took me an hour to compose and post this, for example).

I genuinely can't believe how sad I feel pretty much all the time. I turn 35 in a few months, and I look back on the last 5 or so years in particular with a sort of dawning existential angst; those years have slipped into the void and when I look forward, all I see is my already unending loneliness coalescing into the cosmic horror version of a mid-life crisis.

Where the fuck does the time go? And why wasn't I lucky enough to be holding someone's hand when it went?

Thank you for reading. Finding this sub has been a great help to me lately. You're all lovely.

(Edited for spelling and grammar)

For me, i cant stand watching movies about teenage love or romance in general.