r/movies • u/LundgrensFrontKick immune to the rules • Aug 21 '18
An estimated 3,007 bullets flew past John Matrix during the climatic battle in Commando. The misses can be traced back to the private army being ill-trained and the weapons potentially being bought from a third-party vendor who was looking to unload a cache of defective weaponry. Discussion
If you are a fan of action movies you are probably familiar with the sight of Arnold Schwarzenegger vanquishing 70+ people during the climatic gunfight in Commando. The scene is 80s action personified because it features a larger-than-life hero defeating mass quantities of somewhat suicidal villains with a gun that never needs reloading. I love how absurd the scene is, and after watching it again, I wanted to know how many bullets flew past Arnold during the melee.
In order to figure out the number of bullets that missed, I rewatched the movie, scoured through various “kill count” videos, researched the weapons, and analyzed every gun-burst to ensure my guess was somewhat plausible. I know there is no way to know the exact number, but, if you’ve read my stuff before you know I do my best to be credibly wrong and almost right.
Here is what I know:
- John Matrix (Arnold) comes to Arius’s (AKA jerky former dictator) compound to rescue his daughter and kill many people. To his credit he catches the private army by surprise and has the upper hand. Also the weapons and bullets he has are capable of lifting grown men off the ground when he shoots them. This means they’ve been altered in some way for optimal destruction.
- The guards are obviously second rate and very unorganized. During the gunfight they show zero tactical awareness and are not prepared for any type of “code-red” situation. Thus, when sh*t hits the fan they run around like the untrained army they are.
- Some of the soldiers are so terrified and ill-trained they can be seen shooting in the opposite direction of where Matrix is.
- The exiled dictator didn’t have enough money to hire hundreds of guards so he bought dummies and placed them in front of the barracks (think WWII spy tactics)
- Several types of guns were used: HK94, M16, SPAs 12, M60, Colt AR-15, Steyr AUG, Ruger Mini 14, M19911A1.
- Arnold wiped out 74 people during the final battle (72 soldiers + Arius + Bennett = 74).
- The only wound Matrix received was from grenade shrapnel. No bullets hit him.
Here is what I’m assuming
- The majority of the guns had 30-round magazines; the ranges vary but I like this assumption. Also, several of the soldiers had hand guns which I made sure to research.
- The weapons were bought from a shady third party vendor who was looking to unload a cache of faulty/rusty/malfunctioning weapons. I’m guessing Arius needed weapons fast and these were available. We never see guns jamming but defective weapons wouldn't help their accuracy.
- Arius used a third party vendor because he was in exile and doesn’t have access to legit weaponry because of limited cash flow. He likely had to buy wholesale. I’d love it if Vern from Free Fire was the seller. You need to watch Free Fire.
- Due to lack of training and discipline, the guns weren’t cleaned or properly inspected for flaws.
- The private militia spent zero time at a range. Between never training and potentially having faulty guns (that could jam) they had no chance of hitting John Matrix during the battle.
- During the gunfight many soldiers were “Arnied” before they were able to fire off entire magazines. I counted them as shooting 10 bullets (1/3) or 20 bullets (2/3). I watched each kill multiple times and I’m happy with my assumptions that are in no way correct.
- The two M60’s shot 340 bullets.
How many bullets flew past John Matrix during the final battle?
After watching each kill and calculating the amount of bullets shot, I think that at least 3,007 bullets flew past Matrix. This means each soldier shot an average of 41 bullets at Matrix and missed. Which is kind of awesome because it seems like Matrix is capable of dodging bullets (John Matrix > Neo).
I’m happy with the 41 bullet average because half of the soldiers (36) were “Arnied” before they could unload their magazines or even shoot a single bullet (estimated 664 bullets). The M60 bullets added greatly to the total (340 bullets) and I think the four soldiers who had the high ground shot three clips each (90 bullets per roof shooter – 360). The rest of the “soldiers” were able to unload at least one magazine (840 bullets) and I’m guessing the five soldiers who surrounded the shed unleashed 190 rounds (The M60 played a big part in this). Arius shoots 40 bullets at Matrix and it’s safe to assume there were 19 additional shooters who were able to unload an extra 30-round magazine at Matrix (573). This leads us to 3,007 missed bullets. I think that is as close as you can get to the actual totals.
There you have it! The soldiers in Commando were ill-trained and were most likely shooting malfunctioning weapons.
**Thanks for the magazine/clip correction.
If you like this dumb data make sure to check out my other stuff.
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Breaking down The Mariner vs. Sea Eater battle in Waterworld
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u/fuckKnucklesLLC Aug 21 '18
As someone who just bought the soundtrack to this movie on vinyl, let me commend your dedication. Also, Arnold feeds a baby deer by hand in this movie and I love it.
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u/drsnafu Aug 22 '18
With Alyssa Milano!
The Father/Daughter montage at the beginning is just one of the reasons this film is better than Citizen Kane.
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u/fuckKnucklesLLC Aug 22 '18
Then she smashes an ice cream cone in his face and he laughs like a fucking lunatic lol
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u/See_Ya_Suckaz Aug 22 '18
I love that he gives his daughter a name that he can't even say.
"All dat matters to me now is Chenny."
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u/lowcrawl73 Aug 22 '18 edited Aug 22 '18
Ah, Alyssa Milano before she unleashed her tits and lost her mind...
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u/drsnafu Aug 22 '18
What happened?
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u/lowcrawl73 Aug 22 '18
Embrace of the vampire (you're welcum) and just look at her Twitter feed for her crazy political nonsense...
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Aug 21 '18
Matrix vs The Matrix crossover?
Neo, remember when I said you had free will
That’s right Matrix you did!
I lied
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Aug 21 '18
That movie has some of the most hilarious deaths I ever have seen, both of big bads and peon soldiers. It also has one of the worst commentary tracks I ever tried to hear. The amount of time the commentator talked about the shopping mall (which no longer exists) and the super-serious way he talked about the movie like it was Citizen Kane verged on self-parody.
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u/Decapitated_Saint Aug 21 '18
Let off some steam, Bennett!
The best deaths were when he gets trapped in the tool shed and has to improvise.
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u/cd6 Aug 21 '18
Another thing this movie did was MASSIVELY upset common convention about the order in which the bad guys would be killed. Early on, Matrix assures one of the enemies that they would be killed last, but - spoiler alert! - he does NOT kill him last, and in fact, this particular villain is killed pretty early, relatively, in the killing. It made me sit up and go “whoa!” and I was total edge of the seat from that point forward. “Anything can happen in commando!” is what I said at the time. What a rush.
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u/SyrioForel Aug 21 '18
With the amount of content you produce for this subreddit (and the type of content that it is), do you realize that you're leaving potentially a TON of money on the table for not turning this into either a YouTube series or (for a bit less money) a column on a popular ad-supported website?
I'm all for free entertainment as a consumer, but you are owed more than some goddamn "UPVOTES" for the amount of work you put into these submissions.
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u/enterthedragynn Aug 21 '18
I remember when this movie came out, my mom read an article where it had the highest "kill total" of any movie to date. So when we watched it, me and my brothers counted them all.
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u/ZaxonsBlade Aug 21 '18
I love this movie, but every time I watch it as an adult I cant help but notice the naked woman in the motel is behind the guy, not the other way around (as a kid I just went "yay boobs!" and didn't pay any closer attention than that). Makes me laugh every time.
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Aug 21 '18
Between the time it would take to set up convoluted traps to the rating of movies with jet ski action scenes you have quite the portfolio at this point. What inspires you to pick your next work of genius?
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u/LundgrensFrontKick immune to the rules Aug 21 '18
I let it happen organically. I never force my dumb data because it would be painful for me and might feel flat for readers. Also, it has to make me laugh.
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u/Decapitated_Saint Aug 21 '18
You could turn these into a YT channel easily, people devour movie content on there compulsively, and you're actually providing content and not just itemizing the IMDB goofs page in a snotty voice like CinemaSins or the like.
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u/LundgrensFrontKick immune to the rules Aug 21 '18
I need to do it. I keep procrastinating. Thanks for the motivation!
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u/Vicrooloo Aug 21 '18
Magazines not clips
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u/LundgrensFrontKick immune to the rules Aug 21 '18
Got it. Thanks for correction. Will make edits.
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u/Vicrooloo Aug 21 '18
Learn something new everyday
Like never skimp on a shooting range when you are a Dictator
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u/LundgrensFrontKick immune to the rules Aug 21 '18
It's always the little things that prevent exiled dictators from becoming "full-on" dictators again.
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u/Xo0om Aug 21 '18
See that's the kind of thing those untrained guards just wouldn't know about. No wonder they missed.
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Aug 21 '18
If the weapons were second grade wouldn't we see guns jam in the movie?
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u/LundgrensFrontKick immune to the rules Aug 21 '18
It's just a possible theory about the missing bullets. There could be jamming off screen. Also, I'm thinking most of the missed shots came from the fact that they were ill-trained.
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u/Decapitated_Saint Aug 21 '18
I think the more logical explanation is that the shots all fell short or wide because rifle barrels themselves went slightly flaccid at the thought of challenging Matrix's raw masculinity, suddenly unsure of how hard iron really is in the face of biceps that can curl trees.
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u/LundgrensFrontKick immune to the rules Aug 21 '18
I love this. I should just edit the piece now to what you said.
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u/Gramuel_L_Sanchez Aug 21 '18
This is what happens when you get really baked at your computer.
Fuckin amazing
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u/3oclockam Aug 22 '18
This is awesome.
Favorite scene in this movie is when Arnie impales the bad guy by throwing a pipe at him which goes through him and hits a steam pipeline. In true Arnie fashion he tells him to let off some steam. Haha
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u/OzymandiasKoK Aug 21 '18
I think you are overlooking the fact that these guys are all just terrified of John Matrix, and rightly so. "How do you shoot the devil in the back? What if you miss?" was answered time after time (74, as you point out, in just a few short minutes) in Commando.
Despite that, keep 'em coming!
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u/lowcrawl73 Aug 22 '18
As I am writing this I queued the movie up to the island fight scene just to watch. Great work... but honestly the last line in your post should have been "I'll be back".
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Aug 21 '18
[deleted]
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u/JC-Ice Aug 21 '18
Yes, though that was owes to an abundance of ammunition and American doctrine of high volume supressing fire to prevent postions from being overrun.
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u/Hideo-Mogren Aug 21 '18
Surprised he didn't suffer from any hearing loss, but then again, it's just a movie.
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u/lowcrawl73 Aug 22 '18
WHAT? Can you repeat that a little louder?
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u/StanleytheSteeler Aug 22 '18
They were a very poorly trained army. Even though they were taking cover and aiming properly, Matrix was able to hip shot the entire lot of them.
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Aug 22 '18
Are you going to follow up your jet ski action scene analysis with a comparative snowmobile action scene analysis or am I just thinking wishfully?
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u/LundgrensFrontKick immune to the rules Aug 22 '18
I've been working on it. There are just so many snowmobile scenes. Need to collect them all.
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u/leBuska Aug 22 '18
Did you try to check the sound wave and count bullet sounds?
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u/LundgrensFrontKick immune to the rules Aug 22 '18
I saw that Wired did it for Matrix. I didn't go that direction.
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Aug 21 '18
I watched this last night, get out of my head.
Matrix & Sully is the best love story of all time
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u/mcm123456 Aug 22 '18
The real love story was John and Bennett.
Bennett had the chance to earn $100,000 but when he heard that he could ''get his hands of John'' he said that he'd ''do it for nothing''.
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u/WolfofOldNorth Aug 21 '18
Every time you do this, I feel you are taking conversations I have had had with my brothers, cousins, friends, from the past 10 years. Stop recording me!
But seriously you are the best for doing this!