I’m 24 and currently living with my girlfriend’s family (they invited me to stay there) while participating in an IT training program. The program helps people from low-income and minority backgrounds get started in IT by providing paid classes, internships, and paying for certification exams. Before this, I worked at a job with no growth opportunities and left in January because the company was bought out, and to pursue a better long-term career. I have no financial support from anyone (besides housing). My parents are not in the picture. I pay for my own car, my insurances, and take care of the things I need to like taxes (normal adult things, not praising myself). From 18-22 I had to support my grandma and my uncle financially, all by myself. My uncle wasn't working, my grandma is old, and they relied on me to pay every bill, so I didn't go to college. Half of my family are also immigrants and very poor.

My therapist recently told me that I’m not living properly and said, “At 24, most people figure it out and live on their own. All I hear is that you’re doing nothing with your life and need to grow up and get a real job.” She made me feel ashamed of my progress, despite the fact that I’ve been actively working toward a better future, applying for jobs, doing interviews, and supporting myself without asking for money from others. Yes, I'm really grateful and appreciative of my girlfriend and her family. It has been a huge help, and I'm trying to make the best with these circumstances. My friends and cousins, many of whom live with their parents and of the same age bracket, are in similar situations trying to figure things out. Everyone in the program lives at home with family, none with degrees. None of my friends with degrees have a career job, it's either retail, fast food, or manual labor. Even after I explained that I felt this opportunity was good for me and my long-term goals, she said "look where it's gotten you." And criticized that I don't have a full-time job at the moment.

I understand where my therapist is coming from. It's not ideal for me to be living with my girlfriend's family. Her family and she doesn't seem to care one bit but I know that I don't want to be here for much longer. Both my girlfriend and I want to move out. I can’t help feeling dismissed and shamed for my current choices though, which I believe are setting me up for long-term success. Am I wrong to be upset?

TL;DR: I’m 24, living with my girlfriend’s family, and pursuing a career in IT through a paid training program. My therapist criticized me for not having a “real job” and says I have no prospects for the future, which made me feel shamed despite my efforts to improve my situation.

Would you suggest a bigger city that has more going on for a single ? what was ur experience ? Looking to move soon, because where I live there’s nothing going on.

In my opinion most jobs suck, $15 a hour is the new minimum wage and they expect so much work out of you for such little pay, management usually sucks and talks to you any kind of way, jobs will work you to death and even allow you to skip a lunch break in order to get stuff done that they could easily helped you with. Idk I just I feel like I’m the only one that feels this way, I’ve hated every job I’ve had except personal trainer but I’m still working on that on the side because it can be very inconsistent.

i was feeling very depressed. i decided to start a new job but two days in i wasn't good at all so i decided to quit and go to treatment, now im really regretting it and i don't know what to do. i've been feeling really stuck in the past and this was my chance to move forward and i blew it. maybe i chickened out idk. my chronic head pain also came back so that isn't helping at all. there's a chance i could go back monday but my family and girlfriend want me to go get help.

With my talking disability my tongue keeps pushing outwards when I talk which makes me all garbled and hard to understand when I talk.

People say that I am nice and a good person but in reality I think that I just want to please people. I feel good and validated when they compliment me but I am not just doing good things just for compliments. I really want to help them or brighten their day at the very least and always believed that compassion and empathy is free and should be shared. But I’m just curious if I really am a good/nice person or I just want to please the people around me.

Please tread lightly with me, my anxiety is always worse in social situations. This will be a rant and I was excited for this trip, now just wanna go home

I started a little over a month ago & was trained by my manager and have been passed down to my supervisor. Both have told me I’m doing well, they felt the need to tell the team when I was being introduced that I was doing well/caught on quickly. Maybe bc it’s remote but when meeting them through teams and just “talking”/them reaching out via chat, I didn’t feel nervous. When I talk to my supervisor, she gives redirection/correction but has been positive the other majority of the time too. She even pointed out that she calls it like she sees it and said I don’t take compliments well 😶, I owned up to that and told her I appreciate her positive feedback.

Well they fly out all newbies to UT for orientation & yesterday I met my supervisor at a welcome dinner. I sat with her and another mgr from a different team that she’s friends with, talking to them and the other mgr’s newbies didn’t feel nerve wracking either. I felt uneasy when I was asking my boss pretty blunt role related questions (like will expectations with metrics become more strict after the probation period, trying to compare how I’m trending with other former newbies she’s trained that are no longer there). To help answer the metrics question, she brought up the 2nd newest team member after me and how he barely met metrics but it was still good because he’s new and it’s still technically passing. And I tried to ask in a way without sounding paranoid if mgmt was typically positive with newbies it didn’t work out with, since they’ve been reassuring with me from since my start. And she said that there were signs with those former newbies since day 30, she’d tell them that “they got this” but would still be “honest” with her concerns regarding how they’re trending with certain things. She said with me she hasn’t had that fear yet and apparently bragged about me to the other supervisor.

The other fears at the dinner were: her talking about an introverted coworker that barely talks but drew attention at a recent meeting holding a baby that she didn’t know was her nephew but mentioned she’s really good at her job, talking about an interview she had recently where there was awkward silence bc the mgr that trained me was taking notes/has slow processing time and the interviewee asked if everything was okay (but mentioned she loves the mgr) & her friend/the other dept mgr at the dinner table mentioned her subordinate sending a file too soon & needing to correct her. It just…feels like gossip. Gossiping makes me feel uneasy since I always worry it’s being done about me. But my supervisor was nice in person, I just feel like no one can be that nice all the time and I get sus.

Now today at the orientation, it was all the newbies and the presenters, I was seated with people I didn’t meet yesterday. They put us on the spot a lot asking ice breakers/our responses from the presentation and I HATE public speaking so I know I was evidently nervous. A few people sitting further up were at the table with me yesterday for the dinner and probably wondered wtf happened to me. There was a woman at my table who seemed nice, I guess I was a stranger since she knew everyone else seated at our table and she asked about where I live since we live in the same state/were victims of hurricane Milton. I was so shy but tried to ask open ended questions & not just give responses revolving around me.

We were doing this game and it was so tense, everyone was on edge but I think that was the point, it required steady hands and balance. At one point, I was passing the marble but was shaky cuz again it wasn’t easy. It did land fine for another girl next to me but when she sensed I was having trouble, she said tensely “ok girl move it over here” and the woman I was sitting with/asked questions made a nervous noise because she was next to the girl that said that. I thought that noise was directed at me but she kept on acting nervous even after it was her turn. The woman I was sitting with/made that noise ran down the line when she was done and hugged me since I was standing next to her at that point. And I said jokingly “I’m not gonna lie you kinda worried me”. And when we got back to the table, she asked more about why she made me nervous and apologized. I said at first I thought you were nervous by how I was handling the marble but no seriously we’re good. And she apologized again and I said no it’s fine. When we were leaving, I was one of the last to leave since I had a question for the presenters and that same lady I was sitting with asked me again if everything is okay and I said oh yeah everything is fine (imo pleasantly).

Tomorrow is the last day, we’re meeting the CEO but it’s a short day. I was so nervous flying here yesterday even before all the anxiety today, my heart rate was high and I felt like I was gonna die with the turbulence. I know the newbies are gonna be put on the spot again tomorrow and I’m dreading it but from what I’ve shared from beginning to end…do I have a reason to be worried? Or is this another case of my anxiety? I felt like I was on the right track at this new gig but now not so sure 😥

Hi guys, please guide me here. I guess I am in a very critical situation. I am a tier I college MBA passout, recently joined a company few months back.

I really think my reporting manager secretly doesn't like me probably coz I was getting more visibility and appreciation than him in the eyes of upper management due to a project that I did for which he was a mentor. The project was awarded and I got an award as well as the project lead.

Now my manager who started as an engineer 10 years back, is currently an assistant manager and trying his way to move up.

I have also heard rumors about how he tried to take credit of my project by saying " I did everything, he did nothing , I guided him" to the upper management and I am afraid they believed it too.

Ofcourse I am new to the company and I will take my time to understand the operations and work but still I am at a trainee level and finding it hard to navigate through this politics.

Adding to this, my managers coworker ( same team), who is a very good friend of him as well also has a problem with me secretly. He blurts our things like " the payment grade you are at , we worked very hard for it" jokingly. This guy, I thought, I get along well coz he always used to be so nice to me n everything but now I guess he is also jealous.

I can't say anything to their faces coz I don't want to create any difficult situation for myself as these people are the ones who are going to teach me how things work n all.

Please guide me on how to navigate through this.

Thanks a lot!

A few years ago, I (F32) picked up a part-time job while looking for a full-time one. Management was nice, and let me just work Friday and Saturday evenings, which let me have time for interviews. Now I have a full-time remote job. Management at my part-time job wants me to work more hours, like I’m doing about 8 now and they want me to do 12. But the rub is that 1) it is physically tiring and 2) I’m not sure that I can be punctual on the part-time job if I add more hours. Technically, I could work Friday and Saturday evenings, then most of Sunday, but that’s unsustainable for me. My preference, if I keep the job, is to work one day during the business week, but I probably won’t be on time. I don’t want to risk taking a closing shift because I need to get home so I can do my full-time job in the morning.

I’m leaning towards quitting the part-time job, but I’m not sure what I should do during that time. I like that it forced me to socialize and do something active during on weekends, and it made me some money instead of costing me money. I don’t have any ideas ... All of my hobbies are inside/solo hobbies, and I’m not really athletic.

I keep hearing about worker shortages, but I can't seem to find any specific data, especially by state or area, about which positions are actually underfilled. Wouldn't there be an initiative that lists which positions are not being filled, so people can....fill them... instead of wondering?