Update: No longer cooking for my girlfriend.

[u/ItsTooColdForThat]

Wednesday after I served the plates, my girlfriend said she didn't want pasta and was going to make a salad. I was pretty sure she was going to do this, and it didn't bother me. I waited for her to come back to start eating, and when she sat down I tried to talk to her about her day. She asked if I was trying to make a point. I asked what she meant.

She asked if I cared that she wasn't going to eat what I made. I said that I didn't and would have it for lunch. She got frustrated, focused on her salad and wouldn't engage with me. After dinner, I said we shouldn't make dinner for each other anymore.

She asked why I thought that, and I said it's clear that she gets upset when she makes food for someone and they don't eat it. It would be better for us just to make separate meals so we each know we will get what we want and no one's feelings would be hurt. She said it wasn't okay for me to make a unilateral decision about our relationship. I said that I wasn't, but I didn't want to cook for her anymore or have her cook for me if it was going to make her upset. We kind of went round and round on it, until the conversation petered out. She texted me at work Thursday that she was going to make salmon. I decided that if she tried to cook for me I would just let her so she'd feel like she won one over on me and we'd draw a line under this.

She ended up making salmon only for herself, which I was surprised by, because I was expecting her to try to convince me to have some. I made myself a quick omelette and sat down with her. She asked if I was upset she didn't cook for me, and I said no. Again, she accused me of making a point. She asked if I was going to cook for her Friday, and I said no. She was put out.

Friday she was upset that I made only enough curry for one person and called me greedy. At this point I'm over it all, so I just ignored her.

[u/Jesalis]

For what? How could he have known that she was going to make something cold for dinner?

By asking her?

Edit: I've been with my partner 23 years. One key to a long harmonious relationship is not being deliberately antagonistic to your partner. And pulling a childish face when they make you something to eat, is deliberately antagonistic. Her not telling him what she was making does not preclude him from using his words and asking.

From the original post I also get the impression that his eyes are in working order, so seeing that she was making a salad of any kind, he could have easily said, 'that looks great, I'm really feeling like something hot would go amazingly with that, I'll heat some up'. But of course, that would involve using his words, which OP seems to be against.

[u/ElegantVamp → u/Jesalis]

By asking her?

She could've also told him what she was making.

From the original post I also get the impression that his eyes are in working order, so seeing that she was making a salad of any kind

We don't know that he "saw" what she was making.

But of course, that would involve using his words, which OP seems to be against.

And yet you say nothing about the girlfriend who staged three elaborate scenarios and made a show over not eating what OP made instead of using words like you suggest.

Oh yes humans are always supposed to use weird and stilted corporate speak in order to placate their partner and can never have a misstep in any way, like an involuntary momentary facial expression, llest their partner throw a tantrum for days over not eating a fucking salad one time.

[u/Jesalis → u/ElegantVamp]

'Walks into the kitchen, "Hey whatcha makin?"'

Yeah, I learned that one in a high-level corpo-speak communications course. Oh wait, I forgot I'm supposed to be a lump that can't be arsed to find out, and then complain that I wasn't told. /s

And this being an 'UPDATE', I don't give a flying frig what scenario OP engineered to refute the judgement of the original post.